I hope this won't end up too long but, I have to give a little basic info first. Joe and I are having a LOT of trouble with our 13yr old daughter.
For those that don't know me, I had an affair 3 1/2yrs ago and my H had a revenge affair. Things were not good in our house for quite some time. A lot of yelling, name calling and things getting broken. Joe was also drinking on an almost daily basis. We were so wrapped up in our own crap, our children got lost in the mix.
Our 13yr old was 10 at the time and in March 2011, when she was 11, she ended up in a pediatric psychiatric hospital. She was there 5 days. We had no choice but to send her or we would have went to jail. She was diagnosed with bipolar disorder type II. The hospital psych saw her a grand total of 20 minutes during her time there.
When she was released, we had to take her to counseling and to see a psychiatrist. He stated she never should have been hospitalized and that she was not in fact bipolar. He diagnosed her with ADHD and said she showed strong traits of BPD. Anyway, she was put on mood stabilizers and ADHD meds, all of which she refused to take.
She has become very combative, lies about anything and everything and steals from us. We have had her in therapy, we also had an intensive home therapy thing for like 8 weeks mandated through the state. The latter was due to her cutting herself of which Joe and I were completely unaware. Someone at school saw and told school officials.
I am also a BPD'er and I am having an extremely hard time dealing with her. My mother abused me as a child....physically, verbally and emotionally. I thought if I didn't drink like my mother, I wouldn't be like that with my own children. While I haven't physically abused her, I have done the former. I have become the thing I hated most.
I feel like maybe the best thing to do would be for me to leave. Nothing gets through to her and maybe, if I were gone she might get better. I just don't know anymore.
For those that don't know me, I had an affair 3 1/2yrs ago and my H had a revenge affair. Things were not good in our house for quite some time. A lot of yelling, name calling and things getting broken. Joe was also drinking on an almost daily basis. We were so wrapped up in our own crap, our children got lost in the mix.
Our 13yr old was 10 at the time and in March 2011, when she was 11, she ended up in a pediatric psychiatric hospital. She was there 5 days. We had no choice but to send her or we would have went to jail. She was diagnosed with bipolar disorder type II. The hospital psych saw her a grand total of 20 minutes during her time there.
When she was released, we had to take her to counseling and to see a psychiatrist. He stated she never should have been hospitalized and that she was not in fact bipolar. He diagnosed her with ADHD and said she showed strong traits of BPD. Anyway, she was put on mood stabilizers and ADHD meds, all of which she refused to take.
She has become very combative, lies about anything and everything and steals from us. We have had her in therapy, we also had an intensive home therapy thing for like 8 weeks mandated through the state. The latter was due to her cutting herself of which Joe and I were completely unaware. Someone at school saw and told school officials.
I am also a BPD'er and I am having an extremely hard time dealing with her. My mother abused me as a child....physically, verbally and emotionally. I thought if I didn't drink like my mother, I wouldn't be like that with my own children. While I haven't physically abused her, I have done the former. I have become the thing I hated most.
I feel like maybe the best thing to do would be for me to leave. Nothing gets through to her and maybe, if I were gone she might get better. I just don't know anymore.
Put the internet to work for you.
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