My boyfriend and I have been together for nearly 4 years and living together for most of that time. During the last 4 years I have lost my independence and I feel trapped. We have been finding out we have less and less in common and can't agree on anything. In the beginning I think he just told me what i wanted to hear and now that I rely on him I won't go anywhere. But I want out. The most recent issue is that of children. I want to be a mother more that anything and we have had trouble getting pregnant. I asked how he felt about adoption and his answer really upset me. He said if I could not birth our child he doesn't want one. Adopting would bring an outcast to our family and what would we do with "it". I was devastated. He won't marry me, doesn't want me to work because he likes me around the house, but will constantly give me trouble for not making money. I have to make money of my own, so I got a part time job. So now he takes my car to make me late to work. I think what he is looking for is a mother or a maid, not a wife. How do I regain my independence? He insists he loves me anytime I tell him I am leaving, he will compliment me and try to spoil me if I even hint at leaving. But as soon as I am content he will pick a fight or put me down. I am usually a strong independent woman, but this man has dragged me down and I am trapped. I am so confused.
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