MIL playing Favorites with Grandchildren

My husband and I have two sons, ages 2 and 4. My husband's sister has two daughters, ages 2 and 5. For nearly five years, we have been dealing with a very painful issue involving my husband's parents behavior. In short, his parents play favorites with the grandkids. This has been extremely difficult because my husband has always been considered the "favorite" child of his mother, but in so many ways, she has rejected her "favorite son's" children. Examples of favoritism include watching the girls one day per week so her daughter and daughter's husband can work. My husband asked if she could help us on that day and she suggested we hire someone instead. My husband literally drives by her house to drop our kids off at daycare since the daycare is on her street. I have had the most difficulty with her ignoring our boys when the girls are around. She will only hold the girls and is just generally much more affectionate with them. When we visit with th e boys, we will talk about what the boys are up to and she always injects the girls into the conversation. Recently, my husband took a day trip with his parents and our boys in an attempt to have them spend quality time together. My MIL quietly invited daughter's family. What was supposed to time spent with the boys turned into ignoring the boys because the granddaughters were around. I find it difficult to attend any family parties because it hurts me to see her only holding or playing with the girls. She is pleasant enough to me, but it all feels so phony. I have not handled the situation very well with my husband. I've been highly critical of her behavior and have attacked my husband over his inaction. He would rather keep the peace and go on with the way things are. He is hurt but he is not willing to discuss this hurt with his parents. I have started not attending family functions because I no longer feel emotionally safe in such an environment. I know this bothers my h usband, but he will not protect me or my son's feelings, so I feel it's best to not go. My husband's birthday is coming up and as a tradition she always hosts her kid's birthday in her home. I would prefer to not go and to instead do something with just the four of us. Interestingly, she is very pleasant and kind to the boys when the girls are not present.

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