| Hello guys, This is my first time on a forum like this and looking back years ago i never thought I'll end up in this situation. Me and my husband know each other for 15 years, having a relationship for 11 years live together for 8 years and we married 3 years ago. We have no childrens yet, we always delayed this step into our lives due to financial problems, but the child is in the plan for next year. Anyways, now back to the problem: SEX. We have made hundreds and hundreds of times... In the first three years we were doing it almost daily if not twice a day but all changed once we moved in together. We thought it will be heaven to live together as our love was only growing each day - still is- but in change we hit ourselves by a lot of problems, mostly financial which made me a terrible person, working long hours and being very mean to him .. Ok I've been horrible to him i admit it, any other man would have ran and never come back.. I was yelling at him, treating him bad, telling we will split up, and many other... Throwing with things.. I was so very depressed and trying so hard to provide for us. In short time we achieved what we wanted and i became my old self - even though he says he still sees me like in my bad times and cannot get that out of his head-but this period of time changed our sexual life forever. Since then we only have sex like twice a month and it is not very satisfying. Now he told me i am boring in bed, that i am not sensual nor sexual enough and that all I'm doing is to lie on my back and do nothing.. I totally disagreed with him and instead of having a calm conversation i ended up angry and nervous and crying. I still do not understand why he said so, i am the one initiating sex 90% of the time for years and years, i give him oral each time we have sex, i touch his body all the time while having sex, kiss him, do different positions, and so on.. He never initiates sex, hes never even trying to get me horny, i never get any foreplay, he never touching me even. I don't even remember when he even touched me down there, not to mention giving me oral and such.. Only happened 3 times in all these years.. I always thought he doesn't like doing it. I never complained about his behaviour in bed and I always had the feeling that i am the giver but few days ago he told me that i am boring and do nothing and only sit.. W e even tried in the past to have anal sex because he wanted to give it a try but it wasn't my thing and felt really uncomfortable and bad.. Whenever i wanted to spice things up i ended up hitting myself by a wall.. I asked him if he would like me to wear sexy lingerie, heels, and seduce him but he says that doesn't turn him on.. I wanted to bring sex toys into our bedroom but his answer was a clear no. I am told i am boring and i never do anything different and if i ask him what does he like he says it's my work to find out. I tell him i don't know i can't even tell now when he wants to have sex and when he doesn't , it's like i don't know him anymore. He always wants to cum in the bathroom to not make a mess in the bed because he is kind of obsessed with cleaning, i always agreed with him because he made it clear that's how he wants it and now he told me that i should have insisted for him to do it in bed all these years and not in the bathroom and that is my fault that our sexual acts finish in the bathroom and he hates it... God i just do not know what to understand anymore. I told him he should have just said it, isn't a big thing but then he says I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN IT. This is just an example to many things he says No but after a while i realize that No to him can sometimes mean Yes. Do you guys think he would like to try new things but wen i spell them out he is too shy to say yes? Should i just dress sexy and surprise him? Should i bring sex toys without asking him before? Should it try other various things that cross through my mind without discussing it before? I even proposed the domination but again he disagreed.. I am considered a beautiful woman by the opposite sex, in fact i am a model.. I had lots of proposals from men during years but always refused. My husband is the only man I have ever been with nor do I wish to be with anyone else. I love him more than anything in this world and i have never been sexually attracted by anyone else in my life. Yet.. He doesn't want me.. He watched porn like any other man, i watch too sometimes, it is normal. We never do it together though, he doesn't want it. Yes, i did ask him many times we should do it together but again his answer was NO. Even played a porn while having sex without him approving it.. Again a big refuse and hated me doing that. He also gets soft many times while we are having sex and he says it is because of me, cause i am boring.. I want to make him happy, pleased, loved.. Advice me please.. I hope my story wasn't too long and i am looking forward for any of your answers. Excuse my English if i have made any mistakes, English is my second language only. | |||
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