| Ok so I'm not married, however I'm 27 and my ex girlfriend is 21, both aged last February. But I found this site and hope I can get some mature responses/advice. Basically me and my ex dated for about 14 months. At first I had carried baggage from my previous long-term relationship, which wasn't fair to my current ex. I was lied to and left in the dust by my previous ex and I entered the current relationship overly cautious and very held-back. She saw this as me being untrustworthy, or not involved. I pretty much acted single towards her and she finally broke up with me a little over a month ago. I chased her trying to prove what she really meant and how important she was but she would tell me she just wants time alone and that there isn't (she claims there still isn't) anybody else she's with or looking for. I'd try and leave her alone but she would text me every couple days being normal, checking up on my basically and it always turned into me expressing myself...all through text. Weeks of this occurred until finally I confronted her stringing me along and got her to admit she misses me and has put this wall up but she doesn't know what she wants and is confused. I will add she has yet to tell me to move on and is always asking if I've found somebody else or moved on...something she always felt paranoid about me doing while we dated. After an argument she told me that if I really feel this way to tell her to her face, in person and stop telling it to her through text. She doesn't live close and is always busy with her friends so it was hard to consider meeting her without her dismissing it. I always told her I'm not giving up until she realizes what she really means to me and makes a final decision. We met last Monday, two days ago today. It was the first time I've seen her since the break up. She put on some pounds she claims and has been seeing a female trainer so she can get into shape and we went for a walk as she told me all about it. We went back to my car since it was chilly and I told her everything, I was firm and confident, not pitiful or weak. She said her side and what I did to make her think certain things and she even cried a little. We cut it short after about 2 hours because she was late for her trainer, she gave me birthday presents she had since my birthday in Feb that she hadn't given me. Not 5 minutes until she left she texted me saying how late to her trainer she was but it's not my fault and she was being nice and called me a funny name. I looked at her gifts she got while I was driving and just lost it. They hit home because they were so un-generic and very personal, it shown she really knows what I like, etc. When I got home I thanked her and said how sad it made me for the reason I said here. She said she'd figure I wouldn't be sad anymore and would have moved on by now, but that she didn't think I should have. She also said she hopes I feel closer to her now and I said I felt like I lost her, all she said back was "shh." She continued small talk, asking my opinions on stuff and when I gave negative feedback she said she wouldn't do it, etc. That night I said I wish she was sleeping next to me and she told me she's sorry she couldn't be. I asked if she ever will again and all she said was she can't tell me she will. After I fell asleep she texted me sayi ng she was sick and was going to bed and goodnight, the first time she's said goodnight since we broke up. I was asleep so I didn't respond and didn't when I woke up the next morning. That Tuesday morning she texted me asking why I didn't respond and I told her why, she said "oh," me nothing and that was the last we spoke, it now being Wednesday night. Now unless she's a double agent she doesn't seem to be talking to somebody else, I could be wrong but she's so straight forward and honest and has never lied to me before it just wouldn't fit right now. But I just need advice as to what I should do, or what her motives may be. Should I wait for her to text me now? Or is it a lost cause to where the talk we had gave her closure on our breakup so she's ok to move on? I feel my short answers may have turned her off and that's why she hasn't texted me since yesterday morning, but I don't want to text her and be wasting my time because she'll be civil either way. Sorry this was so long but I felt it is a tricky situation. Thanks for reading. | |||
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