| I really hope this special lady reads this... Not one day goes by where I don't think about you :/. We had a lovely two years together and the memories we shared were amazing. Turkey was an incredible holiday and we named to go back this summer but you left me. Budapest was lovely too it was so cold that we had to snuggle up to each other even when walking through the christmas markets. We shared some nommy food which was a huge part of our relationship because we loved the same things and you introduced me to a couple of dishes and snacks, as did I for you. I know it's been two months since you ended it but I still love you which is killing me. I'm kind of hoping you read this just to know that I still care despite the cruel way you left things with us. This is now my only way of hoping to communicate with you because you blocked me from everything else. I can't apologise enough for being needy and jealous which drove you away. It's crazy how much I've realised how wrong I was for being like that. But I really was tryi ng to adapt like you asked me to. And I was starting to make progress but you gave up before I could show you how I was changing. The distance made it difficult and earlier in our relationship I told you of my doubts about how it wouldn't work etc but you convinced me otherwise and made me give it a go. Only for you to abandon ship a few months into university. I can't blame you really, I wasn't the best boyfriend but I was loving and caring and there for you when you needed me. I think that's what has hit me the hardest about you cutting me out completely. Not having you here for me at all when I relied on you too much throughout our relationship. I didn't mean the harsh things I said to you before you cut me out. In all honesty, and I hate myself for doing this, I was trying to make it easier for you to forget about me by making you think I was mean. I guess deep down I knew you're better off without me but I'm better off with you. That's probably the most selfless acts I' ve ever done. Now, while I'm at home suffering and missing your company and love, you've probably moved on thinking I'm an ******** which has made it easy for you to forget about me. Every part of me wants to contact you but it wouldn't be fair on you at all. I want you to be happy which is odd because you completely screwed me over. Christ, I wish I was a heartless bastard who didnt care. This would be so much easier and I wouldn't be lying her feeling broken. I hope everything is well in your life right now. You deserve it. | |||
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