Boring, normal, ordinary and still painful

There is nothing happening in my marriage that sent me here (after a lot of lurking and reading common experiences) that is not happening to thousands of couples all over the world. At least, that's what I'm guessing based on what I'm reading. Having said that, I sure could use some advice. And someone to talk to. Talking points: - Married almost 15 years. - Eloped after dating for 5 weeks. - Two teenaged children. - I am almost a decade older than he is - We work in the same industry, sometimes for the same employer. - We are both highly intelligent (read: skeptical) - He appears to have lost interest in sex - I am constantly nagging him about hygeine - He doesn't seem to want to engage with me (no discussing politics, planning life things) - When I ask about his day, he never wants to talk about it - When we do talk, it's typically at some time very inconvenient to me (eg, when I am falling asleep) - Typically when he engages with me, it feels like he is doing so to pick a fight. - Most of what he does say to me sounds highly critical or a shallow attempt at being nice - Attempts at marital therapy exercises rapidly devolve into fights. There was more, but I forgot it. The list is too long, anyway. I am so lonely, to the point where it has become difficult to concentrate on other things. I get that he works long hours and that there are a lot of people demanding his time and attention, so that when he comes home, he pretty much wants to crawl into a hole and hide. But he is not making time for me, at all. Many times I will have to repeat something to ensure that he's heard it (often being snapped at), or later be told I never said anything (when I did). I've asked him if he feels depressed, because things he's said indicates he might be (eg, a lack of desire to do things he used to enjoy). Our life has brought a number of big changes in the past year, most of them hugely positive. Things that we both worked very hard to achieve have come to fruition. Having reached that brass ring, he seems to have gone into a funk. Where I thought this would give us an opportunity to do more things together, he's just become withdrawn. Instead of TL;DR, I'm going to stop here. As much as I'd like to go on and on and on in the way a desperate person can... Thanks for reading!

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