My girlfriend of 5 years (we share a home together) was away on business and started conversing and regularly going for drinks with a male (married) co-worker in our age group.
After several hangouts, she agrees to an invitation from him to have some drinks, alone with him, down the hall in his hotel room.
She mentions it to me casually, after the fact, as if expecting me to consider it normal behavior. I disregard the fact that we've been having troubles communicating calmly and effectively lately. Oh, and that the communication issue has led to less frequent physical intimacy.
It's something that I wouldn't have done were roles reversed, personally, just because I have boundaries and wouldn't see as it appropriate...mainly because of 1. what other co-workers might extrapolate if they knew about it, and 2. how it would get my girlfriend's mind racing unnecessarily.
When she told me, I expressed concern, calmly, carefully in the form of a question, so as not to be condescending or antagonistic, about number 1 first. Before I could even bring up number 2, she started to get loudly defensive, saying I should trust her judgement, trust that guy I've never met, et cetera.
The discussion ended in a loud argument, though I tried to keep my cool as long as I could. She just kept yelling until I hung up on her so that I wouldn't lose control and start tearing back into her verbally.
Kinda lost. I feel disrespected. Don't know if I'm being unreasonable.
After several hangouts, she agrees to an invitation from him to have some drinks, alone with him, down the hall in his hotel room.
She mentions it to me casually, after the fact, as if expecting me to consider it normal behavior. I disregard the fact that we've been having troubles communicating calmly and effectively lately. Oh, and that the communication issue has led to less frequent physical intimacy.
It's something that I wouldn't have done were roles reversed, personally, just because I have boundaries and wouldn't see as it appropriate...mainly because of 1. what other co-workers might extrapolate if they knew about it, and 2. how it would get my girlfriend's mind racing unnecessarily.
When she told me, I expressed concern, calmly, carefully in the form of a question, so as not to be condescending or antagonistic, about number 1 first. Before I could even bring up number 2, she started to get loudly defensive, saying I should trust her judgement, trust that guy I've never met, et cetera.
The discussion ended in a loud argument, though I tried to keep my cool as long as I could. She just kept yelling until I hung up on her so that I wouldn't lose control and start tearing back into her verbally.
Kinda lost. I feel disrespected. Don't know if I'm being unreasonable.
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