I just found this website and thought I would vent.. I found out a week before Christmas that my husband was having an affair with a friend. Actually my husband was friendly with the husband first, I just knew she was the wife of the friend. So, basically he had an affair with his friends wife!! But a couple years ago their daughter and my son started a crush with each other, so during that time we ended up spending more time with them because of the kids, this was 2 years ago, and I'll add that I have been married for 18 years. So, for 2 years now we came closer to the couple, even though the kids hanging out a lot faded, but we became good friends with them, because we actually had a lot in common with them ( dinners, weekend get togethers) basically spent a lot of time together, so my husband took our 18 year marriage over a person who he only has really know for two years. So, after this came out in Dec. from what husband had told me that during the summer, she just started texting him out of the blue..A lot of texting.... And he would just text her back each time, even though both knew that they were texting each too much that it wasn't normal for "friends" to be texting this much. When the kids started school, and after school activities, they would see each other in the parking lot everyday, waiting for the kids to come out, so per my husband that's when they became more friends. So from late summer until they got caught, they exchanged about 1,000 some text messages a month and no I never looked in detail at the Bill or I would have noticed there was a lot of texting, but I just knew how much my Bill was each month and just paid it, but even if I noticed he would have lied anyway. Back to how they got caught, the husband found out, and can I add that the husband called the house to let me know!! Well I should say my husband answered the phone and left the dinner table, after 20 minutes or so, my son and I were done eating dinner, I finally got up and went into the bedroom to find out who he was on the phone with.. Lasts when he was literally hanging up the phone and said we had to talk...I was like.. Are you sick...? Well he told me, because the husband was giving him 20 minutes to tell me and that I was to call the husband back ( he wanted proof that my husband told me) basically the daughter was wondering why her mom was leaving the house at the same time several times a week, my husband would get out of work at 3:30 and she worked part time and I worked until 4:30-5:00 so she would go to their meeting spot and he would go there on his way home, and he would be home before I got there, and even knowing my son was home alone. I know he's old enough to be home alone, I guess it was more the point that he's meeting up with her and instead of being home with his kid!!! So I guess after awhile the daughter told the dad, about mom leaving the house the same time on the days they were meet ing up, and when their oldest daughter came home from college the husband had his daughter sneak into her phone while she was sleeping and saw the text messages between her and my husband she deleted the "conversations" but not that they had text each other, so the husband checked their phone records online and that's when he saw all the texts that they were having since the summer which I mentioned 1,000 some texts each month, So, I never thought about my phone records, so I did the same logged online to my account and I had the opposite of the husband I had records of phone calls and not texting. They texted more then anything, obviously, but from Oct. to Dec. there was about 20+ calls during that time, 25 minutes, 15 minute conversations during the day, she only worked until 12:00 and my husband worked on the road a lot so they were able to talk. And when I went through the phone records, she started calling him after they had sex for the first time, before that it was only texting. So, during the next few weeks of finding out, there were all the questions, and yes!! The husband and I compared notes, they both told us they had sex twice. my husband and her actually met that day too, so they went from their meeting in the afternoon and several hours later, busted!!! But found out that they talked to each other the next day and the day after, obviously found out they were comparing notes as well on how many times they were going to tell us how many times they had sex, but what the dumb asses didn't do is compare locations.. So she told him 2 places and my husband told me 2 other spots, that's how we busted them on that!! So it was 4 times and can I add twice in his truck ( which I knew because that's what he had me) so the husband and I did talk several times to each other about this, I think we had every right to talk to each other. But as every person who is cheated on, there are the 10 million questions...which he had an answer for me, ev en with 3 months gone by I still think about it 24/7, some days it gets less, but I have other things to think about too. I feel stuck now, lose my job in Dec. ( which I knew) no where to go....plus I have my son!! He has done everything he can do, he's cried numerous times, it sounds like he regrets it, he's been more loving toward me now then he has been in years, begs me to stay and that he will do anything to keep me from leaving..so I do have to admit he's doing everything for me. We are going to marriage counseling ( which was his idea) and didn't want too, but I made the effort, but I don't think it helps, seems like we fight more afterward, so now up in the in the air to still go or stop?? But over all I'm still with him, I do love him, even though I refuse to say it to him, and by the way I took off my wedding ring the next day, haven't put it back on if I may add it was a new diamond ring from the Christmas before, so that Christmas he was putting it on my finger t his Christmas ( year later) I was taking it off!! I told him why did you bother paying all that money, and!! He wants to trade that ring in and get me a new one, to show me he still loves me.. But I said no, I guess if I wear any ring I feel like I'm telling him it's ok for what he did? So, the next fun event coming up is out anniversary of 19 years, i have no plans on celebrating, of course I didn't tell him that yet, we will see. Sorry, I know this is way to....long... But it's nice putting my thought down.:)
Put the internet to work for you.
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