Hello all,
Have there been times when you were feeling insecure and jealous for no reason? What were the circumstances? If so how did you feel about it, overcome it? Alternatively, have there been times when your spouse was jealous and how did it make you feel, what did you guys do to overcome it?
In my personal case, I deal with a lot of insecurity, low confidence issues which translate into my relationships. I have always been a little socially shy and awkward growing up. I am a an attractive girl, have a good education and come from a loving family, but I am overweight and am slightly socially awkward. My husband on the other hand is very fit, confident and handsome. He used to get a lot of attention from girls and even now when we go out to clubs and bars I notice them looking at him. When I first started dating him I was fit and over the year we have been together I gained weight. I am trying to loose it but it is hard work. I keep stumbling back and forth. Anyways, I am not obese or anything, just get stuck in being plump. Perhaps because I feel my husband dated me when I was slim and he himself is still super fit, i feel like I am not good enough and do not have the energy to go back to being so fit anymore. I do not fear he will cheat on me or hurt me but just little things any guy would say/do makes me feel like I want to die. We are trying to deal with this cause he is a great guy and we still have a healthy sex life etc. but I cannot/do not know how to deal with my feelings and do not want to continue this way.
When I see attractive women that my spouse notices or sometimes when he talks about how hot a celebrity is or fantasizes about them, I feel a surge of jealousy and anger come up. I think about how much better those women are than me. Then I justify that my husband still loves me for my personality and still finds me attractive regardless of the fact that I am overweight. But even this mentality starts to bugs me as I think he is only with me for other reasons not because he thinks I am hot. I want my husband to think I am hot, beautiful, sexy, feel so lucky to have me not just love me for my personality. He gets compliments all the time for his buff muscles. I feel like he is better looking than me cause I don't, I am overweight. I feel people around us, our friends and family, acquaintances think he is better looking than me, I can feel even him thinking he is physically better looking than me. I don't feel the desire in his eyes when he sees me dress up to go clubbing the s ame way when I was fit anymore. I don't feel sexy. I know this feeling is wrong and I am being selfish and putting strain on him for no reason. But I feel this and I don't know how to improve the way I think.
Have there been times when you were feeling insecure and jealous for no reason? What were the circumstances? If so how did you feel about it, overcome it? Alternatively, have there been times when your spouse was jealous and how did it make you feel, what did you guys do to overcome it?
In my personal case, I deal with a lot of insecurity, low confidence issues which translate into my relationships. I have always been a little socially shy and awkward growing up. I am a an attractive girl, have a good education and come from a loving family, but I am overweight and am slightly socially awkward. My husband on the other hand is very fit, confident and handsome. He used to get a lot of attention from girls and even now when we go out to clubs and bars I notice them looking at him. When I first started dating him I was fit and over the year we have been together I gained weight. I am trying to loose it but it is hard work. I keep stumbling back and forth. Anyways, I am not obese or anything, just get stuck in being plump. Perhaps because I feel my husband dated me when I was slim and he himself is still super fit, i feel like I am not good enough and do not have the energy to go back to being so fit anymore. I do not fear he will cheat on me or hurt me but just little things any guy would say/do makes me feel like I want to die. We are trying to deal with this cause he is a great guy and we still have a healthy sex life etc. but I cannot/do not know how to deal with my feelings and do not want to continue this way.
When I see attractive women that my spouse notices or sometimes when he talks about how hot a celebrity is or fantasizes about them, I feel a surge of jealousy and anger come up. I think about how much better those women are than me. Then I justify that my husband still loves me for my personality and still finds me attractive regardless of the fact that I am overweight. But even this mentality starts to bugs me as I think he is only with me for other reasons not because he thinks I am hot. I want my husband to think I am hot, beautiful, sexy, feel so lucky to have me not just love me for my personality. He gets compliments all the time for his buff muscles. I feel like he is better looking than me cause I don't, I am overweight. I feel people around us, our friends and family, acquaintances think he is better looking than me, I can feel even him thinking he is physically better looking than me. I don't feel the desire in his eyes when he sees me dress up to go clubbing the s ame way when I was fit anymore. I don't feel sexy. I know this feeling is wrong and I am being selfish and putting strain on him for no reason. But I feel this and I don't know how to improve the way I think.
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