I suppose I could make it regular sex, or even seeing a marriage counselor, possibly even just reading X,Y,Z book, by a certain date, and if not I see a lawyer and start things rolling. (I have to see a lawyer because I promised the "Considering Divorce" board that I wouldn't move out without doing so, and having some document in place.)
If my wife were posting here, she would have her own set of issues -- he doesn't listen to me, he doesn't do anything around the house, I have to make all the decisions -- all as supportable and reasonable as my complaints.
We have a trip to Italy, the town my father came from, this summer. That wouldn't happen or would be torture if we "separated" before it. So, I guess maybe that should be the deadline. Of course, by August, we may have something else (skiing in Colorado? Trip to Hawaii?) set, and the deadline gets pushed out.
But I have accepted her complaints without pushing my own for so long that I am pessimistic she can find a way to come around. Though we are always on the verge of a fight, for the last month I have highlighted the things I've done (and often stopped doing) over the last six months to meet her complaints -- maybe not enough, maybe not effective but at least they were something. In response, no acknowledgement of my efforts, certainly no guidance on how they should be adjusted to meet her needs, and no efforts to meet my needs (no sex for four months now).
So, is it a final effort? And in my mind, to I make that effort through Italy, or do I make the effort through end of May, then plan for post-Italy? By then, it will be more months without sex than months with sex.
My kids are resilient, and with proper legal protection, I'll see them often enough. And without her, I can be the Dad I want to be. AND, if all goes well, I'll be getting laid. Hell, that has to be better than what I have now.
If my wife were posting here, she would have her own set of issues -- he doesn't listen to me, he doesn't do anything around the house, I have to make all the decisions -- all as supportable and reasonable as my complaints.
We have a trip to Italy, the town my father came from, this summer. That wouldn't happen or would be torture if we "separated" before it. So, I guess maybe that should be the deadline. Of course, by August, we may have something else (skiing in Colorado? Trip to Hawaii?) set, and the deadline gets pushed out.
But I have accepted her complaints without pushing my own for so long that I am pessimistic she can find a way to come around. Though we are always on the verge of a fight, for the last month I have highlighted the things I've done (and often stopped doing) over the last six months to meet her complaints -- maybe not enough, maybe not effective but at least they were something. In response, no acknowledgement of my efforts, certainly no guidance on how they should be adjusted to meet her needs, and no efforts to meet my needs (no sex for four months now).
So, is it a final effort? And in my mind, to I make that effort through Italy, or do I make the effort through end of May, then plan for post-Italy? By then, it will be more months without sex than months with sex.
My kids are resilient, and with proper legal protection, I'll see them often enough. And without her, I can be the Dad I want to be. AND, if all goes well, I'll be getting laid. Hell, that has to be better than what I have now.
Put the internet to work for you.
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