Hi,
I understand this is quite personal but if you can please share your experience with me. I ask because I told my boyfriend I was raped and I don't really understand his reaction. I told him fairly on in our relationship and I pretty much told him everything, he was angry but not at me. I asked him if he thought it was my fault and he said no but it could have been avoided (I was very drunk and allowed myself to mistake someone's open-ness for kindness.) Anyway sometimes when we are intimate I just feel like I can't continue because it doesn't feel right, I let him know but I don't tell him why, because I don't know myself. He says no let's carry on but always stops when I tell him no again. Later he questions me and says why do I do that and tells me it makes him feel 'rapey'. One time we were trying something new and I broke down in tears because I saw his face. He immediately stopped and reassured me it wasn't him and that everything was OK. Once I had calmed down he said t o me we don't ever have to do that again and said maybe we should not be intimate. I appreciate this and I can understand he had good intentions. Also I understand that it can be hard and something like this is very hard to deal with. But I felt in this situation he was sort of insinuating that I did something wrong and that it was my fault he felt we could not be intimate. I really don't want this to sound like I think he's not being supportive or that he's in the wrong because I know he's trying to be and I really appreciate that, but I just want to know what your experience has been.
(PS sorry for not paragraphing)
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