Erm, so I feel weird posting here but figured I'd throw something out there and get some opinions from you crazy guys and gals.
Seeing man a few months (sixish) I met via dating site. We get on well and have fun, our schedules are compatible which is hard for me to find.
On new year's day, sitting next to him, see him texting, screen has text saying 'can't wait to kiss you all over your body' and 'me either' with kiss emojis. Asked him who it was, he said it was his out of state guy friend/they were just joking (no name saved to contact/local area code #), told him I doubted that, and said I could choose to believe him or not and said he wasn't gonna discuss it further, put fone in pocket, and went to bathroom. I told him to be honest that if he was seeing other people and that it would be ok, but just to tell me; he said he was be truthful, and he wasn't gonna discuss further. My gut felt different but couldn't disprove it so let it ride though could never forget it.
Few weeks later, he showed me a pic on his phone and a pop-up message came thru 3x saying a woman had messaged 3 times on Tinder. I told him, X is messaging you and he looked embarrassed, took fone, said was gonna shower, came back said he deleted Tinder, apologized and said "let's make it official." (we had not discussed exclusivity but had been seeing each other steadily at this time; had met his family).
Fast forward – went to his house recently and saw wine in fridge/he doesn't drink wine. Asked about it, he said his friend brought it over; I said what friend, he said a woman's name. She is his old/good friend (I met her once, eons ago, briefly) said she came over on a day he was having home repairs done/she wanted to see the damage and brought that over after he made Facebook post about it. I said, that's odd he never mentioned it to me. He said he didn't feel the need to since it wasn't important and she was only there half hour. I said it was still strange (since I'd never heard from him the rest of that day – in fact, not til following day) and he said "she comes over sometimes." I said, "What?" He said she's been to his home about 2-3x since we've dated, but has never once mentioned her coming over the entire time we've dated; I said it was odd he'd not mentioned it and he said I was interrogating him, got mad, said he didn't wanna hang if I was gonna keep asking abut it, etc. I got upset about that and told him I had valid reasons for thinking it was weird, plus the earlier text and etc. We got into argument and it was awful.
So last week, he finally admits to me that he was in fact s-texting a woman back on new year's. I really appreciated his honesty (finally!) but the problem I have now is, I feel weird he lied about it for 3 months after I asked him point blank so many times/brought up I felt weird about it. Also, I feel he's weird with his phone. Anytime I am around the phone, he moves it. His fone was in the bathroom, I went to the bathroom to blow nose and he immediately came in, moved things around, and grabbed his fone. He prob doesn't realize how much he does it but I find it odd. Anytime he showers, he takes the fone with him. I did experiment and would move near his fone and each time I did (about 5), he came to get the fone. Is this a coincidence or what? I have no way of knowing what's on it because I have no proof and don't want to snoop because I don't want to be THAT woman. Ah! He tells me he's not seeing anyone else, that it's just me, he's not sleeping with anyone else, and how if he wasn't into me, why would he keep seeing me after all this has transpired. I just can't figure out if he's being real or if he's still playing field, hence the phone sh*t. Also, ever since new yea'rs, when the text thing happened, anytime he's texting I wonder if he's texting a woman. How lame!
So. I can't tell if I and am being insecure and need to let it go or if he's putting me on.
Is it… a duck? Or do I need to chill and let it go.
Seeing man a few months (sixish) I met via dating site. We get on well and have fun, our schedules are compatible which is hard for me to find.
On new year's day, sitting next to him, see him texting, screen has text saying 'can't wait to kiss you all over your body' and 'me either' with kiss emojis. Asked him who it was, he said it was his out of state guy friend/they were just joking (no name saved to contact/local area code #), told him I doubted that, and said I could choose to believe him or not and said he wasn't gonna discuss it further, put fone in pocket, and went to bathroom. I told him to be honest that if he was seeing other people and that it would be ok, but just to tell me; he said he was be truthful, and he wasn't gonna discuss further. My gut felt different but couldn't disprove it so let it ride though could never forget it.
Few weeks later, he showed me a pic on his phone and a pop-up message came thru 3x saying a woman had messaged 3 times on Tinder. I told him, X is messaging you and he looked embarrassed, took fone, said was gonna shower, came back said he deleted Tinder, apologized and said "let's make it official." (we had not discussed exclusivity but had been seeing each other steadily at this time; had met his family).
Fast forward – went to his house recently and saw wine in fridge/he doesn't drink wine. Asked about it, he said his friend brought it over; I said what friend, he said a woman's name. She is his old/good friend (I met her once, eons ago, briefly) said she came over on a day he was having home repairs done/she wanted to see the damage and brought that over after he made Facebook post about it. I said, that's odd he never mentioned it to me. He said he didn't feel the need to since it wasn't important and she was only there half hour. I said it was still strange (since I'd never heard from him the rest of that day – in fact, not til following day) and he said "she comes over sometimes." I said, "What?" He said she's been to his home about 2-3x since we've dated, but has never once mentioned her coming over the entire time we've dated; I said it was odd he'd not mentioned it and he said I was interrogating him, got mad, said he didn't wanna hang if I was gonna keep asking abut it, etc. I got upset about that and told him I had valid reasons for thinking it was weird, plus the earlier text and etc. We got into argument and it was awful.
So last week, he finally admits to me that he was in fact s-texting a woman back on new year's. I really appreciated his honesty (finally!) but the problem I have now is, I feel weird he lied about it for 3 months after I asked him point blank so many times/brought up I felt weird about it. Also, I feel he's weird with his phone. Anytime I am around the phone, he moves it. His fone was in the bathroom, I went to the bathroom to blow nose and he immediately came in, moved things around, and grabbed his fone. He prob doesn't realize how much he does it but I find it odd. Anytime he showers, he takes the fone with him. I did experiment and would move near his fone and each time I did (about 5), he came to get the fone. Is this a coincidence or what? I have no way of knowing what's on it because I have no proof and don't want to snoop because I don't want to be THAT woman. Ah! He tells me he's not seeing anyone else, that it's just me, he's not sleeping with anyone else, and how if he wasn't into me, why would he keep seeing me after all this has transpired. I just can't figure out if he's being real or if he's still playing field, hence the phone sh*t. Also, ever since new yea'rs, when the text thing happened, anytime he's texting I wonder if he's texting a woman. How lame!
So. I can't tell if I and am being insecure and need to let it go or if he's putting me on.
Is it… a duck? Or do I need to chill and let it go.
Put the internet to work for you.
No comments:
Post a Comment