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This site is making me feel worse.

I mean no disrespect by the title of my thread, but it is true. I have read about 100 of the threads and I am thinking, Damn I have really put up with a lot of ****. I don't even know where to begin Porn, Chats, Cheating, Separation that led to 2 more kids for him, Pot, Oc's, Meth, Crack, Cocaine, Morphine, Alcohol, you name it and he has done it or wants to do it. Then I look at his pathetic shell of a body and think how can I give up on him, he has all ready giving up on himself? He doesn't see it, he takes everything to the extreme if 1 is good 5 is better. I am lost I try to stay focused on myself and keeping my **** together but everyday it is getting harder. I feel like he is sucking the life right out of me, and that that's what he wants to do. I have used with him not all of them but enough of them. I am no saint but I sleep every night I eat everyday I work everyday and I take care of my grand kids 5 nights a week so yes I am or was very recreat ional, but I am sick of even that cuz he can't be. So once again I have stopped all used of drugs and he is high right now beating off and has been since last night.... any advise will be read no need to tell me I am stupid I feel that plenty. We have been together for 15 yrs with a 3 yr separation that I wanted for these same reasons as now.... is their anyone else going threw anything remotely like this that I can talk to. Even if you have been the one like him if you can give me any insight... Thanks

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