We've been married almost 15 years with 2 kids, 11 and 7. We are complete opposites. I'm more reserved and she is more of the social one. I don't drink at all and she does. Like I said we are total opposites. sometimes, she calls me a prude. We always thought that is what brought us together. Recently we moved to a new neighborhood and she has made some great friends on the street. I like our neighbors as well but they like to drink a lot. I don't care that she drinks but she has stumbled home more than a few times walking home. We've been to a few parties on the street and as usual, she will drink, sometimes a lot while I drink a soda or water.
Recently she has taken a few girls trips with neighbors. On one trip to the beach, her and one of our neighbors met a guy at the beach who was there with his mother. He takes them out to dinner and buys their drinks. I didn't find out until after she came home that this happened. I got very upset that she did this and didn't tell me. Her excuse was that they told the neighbor's husband and that everything was fine. I was pissed and told her that she pretty muched lied to me while she was gone. I told her that she should be more careful of strangers and that he could have tried to drug them but she told me I was being rediculous.
On this past trip, she took our kids to our home town to see her aunts and grand parents while I stayed home and worked. They were gone for 3 weeks. While she was there, she spent time with her step sister and friends and going out drinking and having a good time. She would text me most days and if she would be going out with her sister, I would always ask her to be careful and not drink and drive. I have to admit, i think I asked her to do that a lot because it seemed like thats all she did. She got perturbed by my constant reminders.
She finally comes home and we have a huge argument. She tells me she needs to get away to find herself. I tell her she has been gone for 3 weeks with little responsibility of the kids because they were being cared for by relatives while she partied. I have been at work and home by myself for 3 weeks. I asked her why she needed more time away. She tells me she hasnt felt like she has been in a right state of mind for a while She tells me she loves me but she doesn't think she is the right one for me. I tell her that she is the right one and I will always love her. She still wants to get away. I asked her if she was in love with someone else and she said no. I asked her what I could do to make her want to stay and she says she doesn't know. She wants to separate and try to sort herself out but she is wanting to go back and stay with her step sister, I tell her that her step sister and friends will be a distraction and she will not be able to focus on herself and she why she wan ts to leave me and our 2 kids. She wanted to be able to come home sometimes to see the kids and I told her that once she leaves to find herself, she can't come home until she knows if she is coming home to stay. I didn't want her to use the kids as an excuse to leave again if they drive her crazy one day. I know this is probably not a very good background but is anyone else's wife wanting to separate to go "find themselves"? I'm 42 and she is 37 and she seems to be the one with the mid-life crisis. I'm lost. I love my wife and would do anything for her but it doesn't seem to be enough. I'm trying to be supportive but part of me think she is being selfish.
Recently she has taken a few girls trips with neighbors. On one trip to the beach, her and one of our neighbors met a guy at the beach who was there with his mother. He takes them out to dinner and buys their drinks. I didn't find out until after she came home that this happened. I got very upset that she did this and didn't tell me. Her excuse was that they told the neighbor's husband and that everything was fine. I was pissed and told her that she pretty muched lied to me while she was gone. I told her that she should be more careful of strangers and that he could have tried to drug them but she told me I was being rediculous.
On this past trip, she took our kids to our home town to see her aunts and grand parents while I stayed home and worked. They were gone for 3 weeks. While she was there, she spent time with her step sister and friends and going out drinking and having a good time. She would text me most days and if she would be going out with her sister, I would always ask her to be careful and not drink and drive. I have to admit, i think I asked her to do that a lot because it seemed like thats all she did. She got perturbed by my constant reminders.
She finally comes home and we have a huge argument. She tells me she needs to get away to find herself. I tell her she has been gone for 3 weeks with little responsibility of the kids because they were being cared for by relatives while she partied. I have been at work and home by myself for 3 weeks. I asked her why she needed more time away. She tells me she hasnt felt like she has been in a right state of mind for a while She tells me she loves me but she doesn't think she is the right one for me. I tell her that she is the right one and I will always love her. She still wants to get away. I asked her if she was in love with someone else and she said no. I asked her what I could do to make her want to stay and she says she doesn't know. She wants to separate and try to sort herself out but she is wanting to go back and stay with her step sister, I tell her that her step sister and friends will be a distraction and she will not be able to focus on herself and she why she wan ts to leave me and our 2 kids. She wanted to be able to come home sometimes to see the kids and I told her that once she leaves to find herself, she can't come home until she knows if she is coming home to stay. I didn't want her to use the kids as an excuse to leave again if they drive her crazy one day. I know this is probably not a very good background but is anyone else's wife wanting to separate to go "find themselves"? I'm 42 and she is 37 and she seems to be the one with the mid-life crisis. I'm lost. I love my wife and would do anything for her but it doesn't seem to be enough. I'm trying to be supportive but part of me think she is being selfish.
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