My husband and I have been married for over 2 years, together for 7. We have always had issues with sex and communication, and lately, trust.
He never wants to have sex, say anything sexual or let me know he notices me at all. He also won't discuss it, except to say he's just not a sexual person and just never thinks of it. This is difficult because I am a very sexual person.
We never seem to resolve any problems. He just responds with "I don't know what to tell you" and that is the end of discussion. Even going as far as flat out ignore the fact that I am speaking if I continue. He has also started lying off and on and getting worse. It ranges from if he stopped at the store or not, to lying about money. He recently took a new job without even discussing it with me.
I have really tried to fix things, communication exercises, setting aside time to discuss issues, suggesting therapy, he won't try. I even offered on week where he could ask for anything sexual and I could not say no, in an attempt to show he can trust me with what he wants and I won't reject him.... He didn't want to do anything. So I've tried to leave him alone, let him know I'm not trying to pressure him to work on our relationship.
I recently found him speaking to a woman online. Telling her how much he wants to be with her, what he wants to do to her (all responding to her naked pics) and how she is his "dream woman". If it were porn, I would not be upset, but this is a real person who he found in a forum type setting. He asks that I trust nothing more happened, but that just seem naive. I gave him a few days to come up with things to discuss to try to rebuild, he promised he would and then blew me off and deleted the account so I could not "check" it. I don't know how he can be so nonsexual with me, then seek her out. Some of the things he talked to her about were things he's rejected from me!!! I have no idea what to do anymore to fix this.
Sorry this story got so long winded, any advise would be appreciated.
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He never wants to have sex, say anything sexual or let me know he notices me at all. He also won't discuss it, except to say he's just not a sexual person and just never thinks of it. This is difficult because I am a very sexual person.
We never seem to resolve any problems. He just responds with "I don't know what to tell you" and that is the end of discussion. Even going as far as flat out ignore the fact that I am speaking if I continue. He has also started lying off and on and getting worse. It ranges from if he stopped at the store or not, to lying about money. He recently took a new job without even discussing it with me.
I have really tried to fix things, communication exercises, setting aside time to discuss issues, suggesting therapy, he won't try. I even offered on week where he could ask for anything sexual and I could not say no, in an attempt to show he can trust me with what he wants and I won't reject him.... He didn't want to do anything. So I've tried to leave him alone, let him know I'm not trying to pressure him to work on our relationship.
I recently found him speaking to a woman online. Telling her how much he wants to be with her, what he wants to do to her (all responding to her naked pics) and how she is his "dream woman". If it were porn, I would not be upset, but this is a real person who he found in a forum type setting. He asks that I trust nothing more happened, but that just seem naive. I gave him a few days to come up with things to discuss to try to rebuild, he promised he would and then blew me off and deleted the account so I could not "check" it. I don't know how he can be so nonsexual with me, then seek her out. Some of the things he talked to her about were things he's rejected from me!!! I have no idea what to do anymore to fix this.
Sorry this story got so long winded, any advise would be appreciated.
Posted via Mobile Device
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