Basically, I have started seeing a girl and it is turning into a FWB arrangement. I hate to sound all 'tabloid' but I have never had sex like that before, in terms of intensity of how we feel attracted to each other and everything is in sync. It is like all we want to do is tear each other up and to be honest both of us are playing it cool when in each other's company (e.g. we watch films in her flat and I laugh at her terrible choice of music and bring my own over).
We both want it to stay "non-serious" as we both come from strict Christian, single sex school backgrounds where if we enter into a relationship then our parents will make a big fuss over it. We joke quite a lot about having to pretend to be people we are not in church and in front of family. Because of family pressure to put up a good image. We also joke about our parents saying to us "Time to settle down and marry into a good family since you are a graduate now and starting your working lives".
What I usually do if i start to actually like a girl is I usually run. This has happened due to a very bad experience in the past with my ex (my only ever gf, very serious r'ship).
I just wish though that I can keep what I have now with the girl without liking her anymore than I do. I like her right now, but I don't want to feel addicted and vulnerable if that makes sense? It is difficult right now because I am confused.
We see each other, we joke around but underneath it all we just really want each other in the physical sense. I am just worried that human weakness and emotions will come into it because it is nothing as intense as I have had before physically. I hope it is just sex, I really do because I am afraid. I know part of it is because we've both had very strictly religious upbringings in public boarding schools and it is a reaction to the frustration of repression to an extent (she has never felt comfortable enough to bring a boyfriend back home officially).
But you know, I just keep thinking about wanting to see her, although when in a FWB arrangement, it really does help to limit contact. I told her I don't care if she sees other guys and she told me that she does not care if I see other girls. We both agreed not to try and find out/pry about our other relationships and I am going to keep to that agreement.
But, I am just worried about this whole link between the physical and the mental side of things.
We both want it to stay "non-serious" as we both come from strict Christian, single sex school backgrounds where if we enter into a relationship then our parents will make a big fuss over it. We joke quite a lot about having to pretend to be people we are not in church and in front of family. Because of family pressure to put up a good image. We also joke about our parents saying to us "Time to settle down and marry into a good family since you are a graduate now and starting your working lives".
What I usually do if i start to actually like a girl is I usually run. This has happened due to a very bad experience in the past with my ex (my only ever gf, very serious r'ship).
I just wish though that I can keep what I have now with the girl without liking her anymore than I do. I like her right now, but I don't want to feel addicted and vulnerable if that makes sense? It is difficult right now because I am confused.
We see each other, we joke around but underneath it all we just really want each other in the physical sense. I am just worried that human weakness and emotions will come into it because it is nothing as intense as I have had before physically. I hope it is just sex, I really do because I am afraid. I know part of it is because we've both had very strictly religious upbringings in public boarding schools and it is a reaction to the frustration of repression to an extent (she has never felt comfortable enough to bring a boyfriend back home officially).
But you know, I just keep thinking about wanting to see her, although when in a FWB arrangement, it really does help to limit contact. I told her I don't care if she sees other guys and she told me that she does not care if I see other girls. We both agreed not to try and find out/pry about our other relationships and I am going to keep to that agreement.
But, I am just worried about this whole link between the physical and the mental side of things.
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