I'd like an objective view on this situation. I've posted about this before and feel quite pathetic for doing so again. I guess I just need someone on the outside to tell me what they think.
I ended my relationship on the basis that we were religiously incompatible. I thought it would save him from further heartache if I did so. I don't have a Facebook, an Instagram or Twitter so I'm pretty disconnected apart from Whatsapp/text. My friend told me that on Facebook, a girl who we both know at uni suggested quite bluntly to her that she's interested in my ex. She commented on his looks, how tall and funny he is etc. We've been apart for a significant amount of time so I completely understand her interest. I know this girl quite well, we sit together in lectures sometimes and have had lunch. We're not very close but we're not exactly strangers either. I initially felt hurt *I know, I have absolutely no right to be*. I should be grateful that at least she's even considering my feelings by asking my friend if he's single. My friend said it wouldn't be a good idea, so now I'm left feeling like I'm affecting his future relationships. It's complicated because he still mes sages me on Whatsapp with funny comments/ asking about my day and we speak on the phone often. I want to cut him off but I can't because deep down I still love him. It's not easy to shake and despite knowing that it can't lead anywhere I don't want anybody else to have him. I feel pathetic and like a complete drain on his life. He's adamant that we be "friends" but he's frequently suggestive and one night spoke of his feelings. I recently stayed behind at uni to revise with a Muslim guy and a few others who we both know. He sent me a message a few hours later telling me that he had seen us. I instantly felt bad and told him we were just revising. He said that he knows but he can't help but feel protective as he felt he was being replaced by a guy who has what he doesn't- the same religious beliefs. I feel like a complete witch for doing this to him. I should have known that a non-Muslim guy would not fair well in getting involved with me but instead I kept it going for well over a year. I know he won't be interested in her but part of me selfishly wants her to at least try, so as to allow him the chance to forget about me.
If I don't respond to his texts, I feel terrible. If I ignore his calls, I feel like a bitch. He perseveres and tells me that he knows that I'm not as religious as I let on. All my Muslim friends are telling me to be "strong" but it's easier said than done. Only one tells me that she'll support me regardless and that my life is like a modern day Bollywood film. Now that I know she likes him, I feel protective (I know it's not right). We didn't talk for a grand total of 1 week before he started to text how much he missed me and that he "can't do it". He's usually guarded, when I first met him he was a bit shy toward me but hilarious. This makes me feel worse and I feel like an idiot for posting this on here. I'm not the emotional type and I'm not one to act illogically but this situation is complicated. We're in the same lab group and I can tell that he lingers sometimes just to be able to walk and talk with me. It makes me extremely sad and I just want to hug him but I know t hat I shouldn't because it's misleading.
Could any of you give me advice or just your views on the situation? I just need to read something from someone who doesn't know me and can at least try to understand?
I ended my relationship on the basis that we were religiously incompatible. I thought it would save him from further heartache if I did so. I don't have a Facebook, an Instagram or Twitter so I'm pretty disconnected apart from Whatsapp/text. My friend told me that on Facebook, a girl who we both know at uni suggested quite bluntly to her that she's interested in my ex. She commented on his looks, how tall and funny he is etc. We've been apart for a significant amount of time so I completely understand her interest. I know this girl quite well, we sit together in lectures sometimes and have had lunch. We're not very close but we're not exactly strangers either. I initially felt hurt *I know, I have absolutely no right to be*. I should be grateful that at least she's even considering my feelings by asking my friend if he's single. My friend said it wouldn't be a good idea, so now I'm left feeling like I'm affecting his future relationships. It's complicated because he still mes sages me on Whatsapp with funny comments/ asking about my day and we speak on the phone often. I want to cut him off but I can't because deep down I still love him. It's not easy to shake and despite knowing that it can't lead anywhere I don't want anybody else to have him. I feel pathetic and like a complete drain on his life. He's adamant that we be "friends" but he's frequently suggestive and one night spoke of his feelings. I recently stayed behind at uni to revise with a Muslim guy and a few others who we both know. He sent me a message a few hours later telling me that he had seen us. I instantly felt bad and told him we were just revising. He said that he knows but he can't help but feel protective as he felt he was being replaced by a guy who has what he doesn't- the same religious beliefs. I feel like a complete witch for doing this to him. I should have known that a non-Muslim guy would not fair well in getting involved with me but instead I kept it going for well over a year. I know he won't be interested in her but part of me selfishly wants her to at least try, so as to allow him the chance to forget about me.
If I don't respond to his texts, I feel terrible. If I ignore his calls, I feel like a bitch. He perseveres and tells me that he knows that I'm not as religious as I let on. All my Muslim friends are telling me to be "strong" but it's easier said than done. Only one tells me that she'll support me regardless and that my life is like a modern day Bollywood film. Now that I know she likes him, I feel protective (I know it's not right). We didn't talk for a grand total of 1 week before he started to text how much he missed me and that he "can't do it". He's usually guarded, when I first met him he was a bit shy toward me but hilarious. This makes me feel worse and I feel like an idiot for posting this on here. I'm not the emotional type and I'm not one to act illogically but this situation is complicated. We're in the same lab group and I can tell that he lingers sometimes just to be able to walk and talk with me. It makes me extremely sad and I just want to hug him but I know t hat I shouldn't because it's misleading.
Could any of you give me advice or just your views on the situation? I just need to read something from someone who doesn't know me and can at least try to understand?
Put the internet to work for you.
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