There aren't really many things I care about in the world. I don't feel a connection at all with some things, or people. Even my parents, I don't feel too close to. Maybe I'm thinking like a nihilist? I'm probably pretty scary, as in, think some pretty scary things...
99% of the time, I'm feeling positive, happy, etc. People say I give out a positive vibe. I rarely EVER feel sad, stressed or whatnot. I don't know, at a certain point last (academic) year I just stopped caring about things. If not, I'm sort of in a 'null' state where I don't really feel anything. I used to feel empty and lonely sometimes, but it seems like I don't even feel that at all now. That might be because I speak to my best friends like every day. I'm 16 year old guy, btw, in 6th form. (Perhaps this was all caused by a 'traumatic' event with a girl that 'I fancied' but had never spoken to, and did nothing about it)
Now the problem is I don't really find any girls attractive (even models), sure I can look at them and see why others would think they're pretty, but my lack of emotions means I don't really feel much towards them. I think I fancy this girl, I do think she's sort of good looking, but I don't like, fancy her super badly. I think I want to fancy her though, I feel like that it would be a huge loss for me if I didn't because I think she's amazing. I've never really experienced love, but I get the impression I won't be able to experience, simply because of my lack of emotions. I wouldn't mind if I can't find the right love, but I'm pretty sure if I can find the right love it'll make me better off, and even happier. I've never even kissed a girl and a lot of my good friends around me now are in relationships. A while ago, I remember having a desire to have my first kiss soon but now I don't really care about it. Although I'd like to have my first kiss with this particular girl.
People can do nice things for me, and I'll really appreciate it at the moment, but I can just forget about those things quite easily. I still do good things in return for them though. I can forget some people really quickly, particularly if I think they're a negative influence or are harmful to me or my growth as a person. I avoid negativity and try to be around positivity. I really don't like thinking about past/previous sad memories; I think they're a hindrance and I only really think about the present and future... I don't really enjoy anything either. Like I went travelling myself this summer, around the world, and it was good to see relatives and try new things. I didn't really 'enjoy' it, like, absolutely loved it, but I did like the trip to some extent. However, if given the choice to go again I don't know if I'd take it; another problem I have is that I get bored of a lot of things really quickly.
I go to a boarding school and I really like school life there. I never really want to go home when I'm there.
Is there anything I can do to experience more emotions..? How can I overcome this asexual-like aspect of mine? If you have any more questions about me then ask away...
99% of the time, I'm feeling positive, happy, etc. People say I give out a positive vibe. I rarely EVER feel sad, stressed or whatnot. I don't know, at a certain point last (academic) year I just stopped caring about things. If not, I'm sort of in a 'null' state where I don't really feel anything. I used to feel empty and lonely sometimes, but it seems like I don't even feel that at all now. That might be because I speak to my best friends like every day. I'm 16 year old guy, btw, in 6th form. (Perhaps this was all caused by a 'traumatic' event with a girl that 'I fancied' but had never spoken to, and did nothing about it)
Now the problem is I don't really find any girls attractive (even models), sure I can look at them and see why others would think they're pretty, but my lack of emotions means I don't really feel much towards them. I think I fancy this girl, I do think she's sort of good looking, but I don't like, fancy her super badly. I think I want to fancy her though, I feel like that it would be a huge loss for me if I didn't because I think she's amazing. I've never really experienced love, but I get the impression I won't be able to experience, simply because of my lack of emotions. I wouldn't mind if I can't find the right love, but I'm pretty sure if I can find the right love it'll make me better off, and even happier. I've never even kissed a girl and a lot of my good friends around me now are in relationships. A while ago, I remember having a desire to have my first kiss soon but now I don't really care about it. Although I'd like to have my first kiss with this particular girl.
People can do nice things for me, and I'll really appreciate it at the moment, but I can just forget about those things quite easily. I still do good things in return for them though. I can forget some people really quickly, particularly if I think they're a negative influence or are harmful to me or my growth as a person. I avoid negativity and try to be around positivity. I really don't like thinking about past/previous sad memories; I think they're a hindrance and I only really think about the present and future... I don't really enjoy anything either. Like I went travelling myself this summer, around the world, and it was good to see relatives and try new things. I didn't really 'enjoy' it, like, absolutely loved it, but I did like the trip to some extent. However, if given the choice to go again I don't know if I'd take it; another problem I have is that I get bored of a lot of things really quickly.
I go to a boarding school and I really like school life there. I never really want to go home when I'm there.
Is there anything I can do to experience more emotions..? How can I overcome this asexual-like aspect of mine? If you have any more questions about me then ask away...
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