Quick Advice Needed

My wife and I separated a couple of months ago. I believe the proper term for it is "emotional abandonment" Several years ago our child began playing sports and my wife managed the team. It gradually grew into a travel ball team and i that point I was heavily involved. So after a short period of time I became manager and it became my world. I thought she was ok with the help she did on the team but I was wrong ! So after years of holding it in she finally snapped and told me she wanted a divorce. Of coarse there is more to the story but the advice I'm looking for is on this. We never completely split up and I been working really extra hard to understand how she felt and what I did. I know I did wrong and I am wanting, trying, and doing what ever it takes to understand and change myself from the person that made those mistakes. She says "She loves me but not in love with me" I know she is very hurt, confused and scarred. I recognize that she was hurting fo r several years and I'm not expecting to be forgiven in a few weeks.
So here is where I'm stuck now. I love her very much and very understanding of here feelings. I told her to take as long as she needed to decide if she wants to get back with me or continue with a divorce. We've made good progress but it kind of hit a stand still. I understand it takes time but I'm scarred that I may be starting to become bitter because of the control she has over my life right now.
Believe me I know that if I really lover and want her back , , , which I do I need to relax and give her time and space but my heart hurts and my mind is trying to convince it to man up and put my foot down.

So what do you think ?

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