I had a horribly depressing day.
I'm starting to realize that I'm getting really depressed. I don't even know how to express myself in a way that can make sense.
Literally all I feel like doing is crying. I'm very emotionally vulnerable right now.
I'm having a hard time getting out of bed. I'm exhausted and feel tired almost all the time. I'm having a hard time keeping up with household chores. I don't even feel like going outside.
I don't want to interact with people except my son, Aang and my mom.
I've had triggers lately. I used to be a cutter/burner. I self harmed to feel physical pain rather than emotional pain, and I've had thoughts about it. I've freed myself from that for over 2 1/2 years but I'm triggered.
Finances aren't good right now. I need a job, but I have to wait for my mom to move here so that she can watch my son while I try to get back above water. (I've already spoken to her about this, and she's on board because she wants to spend time with her grandson).
But I also need therapy. And I don't feel mentally capable or ready to hold a job. I'm already stressed to the limit, and I'm scared of overwhelming myself more. But I need a job. I need to financially support my family.
Before anyone mentions, I am on a waiting list for therapy. There's nothing I can do to speed it up, I just have to wait.
Food stamps aren't available in Canada either.
I also have next to no motivation.
I guess I'm crying for help. And I needed to vent. I feel like I'm starting to drown and I really need to get above water.
I'm starting to realize that I'm getting really depressed. I don't even know how to express myself in a way that can make sense.
Literally all I feel like doing is crying. I'm very emotionally vulnerable right now.
I'm having a hard time getting out of bed. I'm exhausted and feel tired almost all the time. I'm having a hard time keeping up with household chores. I don't even feel like going outside.
I don't want to interact with people except my son, Aang and my mom.
I've had triggers lately. I used to be a cutter/burner. I self harmed to feel physical pain rather than emotional pain, and I've had thoughts about it. I've freed myself from that for over 2 1/2 years but I'm triggered.
Finances aren't good right now. I need a job, but I have to wait for my mom to move here so that she can watch my son while I try to get back above water. (I've already spoken to her about this, and she's on board because she wants to spend time with her grandson).
But I also need therapy. And I don't feel mentally capable or ready to hold a job. I'm already stressed to the limit, and I'm scared of overwhelming myself more. But I need a job. I need to financially support my family.
Before anyone mentions, I am on a waiting list for therapy. There's nothing I can do to speed it up, I just have to wait.
Food stamps aren't available in Canada either.
I also have next to no motivation.
I guess I'm crying for help. And I needed to vent. I feel like I'm starting to drown and I really need to get above water.
Put the internet to work for you.
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