Hello all, I want to start by giving a short background.
My wife and I have been together for 3 years, married less than a year. We have a 5 year old girl (my stepdaughter) and a son who is 19 months old.
I honsestly love my wife, I feel that she loves me as well.
We bought a beautiful home together and she was able to leave her job to be a stay at home mom, I love that she is able to, she is an amazing mother.
We have a good relationship for the most part.
We had an incident this past weekend, we had friends over and their 2 children, we camped out in the backyard, fire, outdoor movies, great time, we actually didnt go to bed till 5am, it was at that point that it went downhill..
I went to get our son (19mo old) so he can sleep with us in the tent, changed his diaper, made his bottle while my wife headed to bed, our friends were sharing our tent and the 5 year olds shared another.
My son was wide awake at this point and we were all exausted, he proceeded to cause mayhem in the tent, running around, screaming just tearing it up like he does so well lol.
Anyway, after 10 minutes of this behavior I realized that he wasnt going to fall asleep, he wasnt in his comfortable surroundings, I realized that our friends were getting impatient and since my wife was doing nothing about the situation I took my son to
His room and put him in bed, he immediatley rolled over and went to sleep.
I went to our bedroom and hit the sheets and started to drift off.... Thats when my wife woke me, told me I was rude to come sleep inside, she agreed that our boy shouldnt be in the house alone and "offered" to sleep inside our wonderfully air conditined room while I went back outside to sleep in the hot tent with our friends wife (her hubby felt more comfortable sleeping right outside the girls tent posting as guard)
Anyway, I refused, I didnt feel comfortable sleeping in the tent with her alone, especially since she is more my wifes friend than mine, not that anything wouldve happened, just a comfort level.
We got into an argument, I was half asleep and dead tired, I didnt want to fight so I went into our spare bedroom to get away from her and locked the door. She barged in to argue, I asked her to stop, "can we do this tomorrow please?"
Not a chance, she had to fight right then and there because "camping is your thing, your idea"
I lost my temper and tried to shove her out of the room, I pushed her a couple of times but she wouldnt budge, thats when I left...
I got in my car and left before I got more physical.
I realize that theres no excuse for my actions, I need to control myself better.
I honestly saw red and Im afraid that it couldve been worse.
Im a big guy, my wife is petite and I have trained and competed in martial arts for years and I dont want to hurt anyone, least of all my beautiful wife.
She knows my buttons, this isnt the first similar situation, she doesnt know when to just leave me alone, she just keeps going, antagonizing me till I lose it.
I feel that she does it on purpose because she knows what the outcome will be and if shes lucky enough I WILL hit her and shes will have everything.
On the other hand, maybe she is like me and just cant control herself enough to back off.
Please help with any experiences and insight, I dont want this to happen again.
Thank you
RG
My wife and I have been together for 3 years, married less than a year. We have a 5 year old girl (my stepdaughter) and a son who is 19 months old.
I honsestly love my wife, I feel that she loves me as well.
We bought a beautiful home together and she was able to leave her job to be a stay at home mom, I love that she is able to, she is an amazing mother.
We have a good relationship for the most part.
We had an incident this past weekend, we had friends over and their 2 children, we camped out in the backyard, fire, outdoor movies, great time, we actually didnt go to bed till 5am, it was at that point that it went downhill..
I went to get our son (19mo old) so he can sleep with us in the tent, changed his diaper, made his bottle while my wife headed to bed, our friends were sharing our tent and the 5 year olds shared another.
My son was wide awake at this point and we were all exausted, he proceeded to cause mayhem in the tent, running around, screaming just tearing it up like he does so well lol.
Anyway, after 10 minutes of this behavior I realized that he wasnt going to fall asleep, he wasnt in his comfortable surroundings, I realized that our friends were getting impatient and since my wife was doing nothing about the situation I took my son to
His room and put him in bed, he immediatley rolled over and went to sleep.
I went to our bedroom and hit the sheets and started to drift off.... Thats when my wife woke me, told me I was rude to come sleep inside, she agreed that our boy shouldnt be in the house alone and "offered" to sleep inside our wonderfully air conditined room while I went back outside to sleep in the hot tent with our friends wife (her hubby felt more comfortable sleeping right outside the girls tent posting as guard)
Anyway, I refused, I didnt feel comfortable sleeping in the tent with her alone, especially since she is more my wifes friend than mine, not that anything wouldve happened, just a comfort level.
We got into an argument, I was half asleep and dead tired, I didnt want to fight so I went into our spare bedroom to get away from her and locked the door. She barged in to argue, I asked her to stop, "can we do this tomorrow please?"
Not a chance, she had to fight right then and there because "camping is your thing, your idea"
I lost my temper and tried to shove her out of the room, I pushed her a couple of times but she wouldnt budge, thats when I left...
I got in my car and left before I got more physical.
I realize that theres no excuse for my actions, I need to control myself better.
I honestly saw red and Im afraid that it couldve been worse.
Im a big guy, my wife is petite and I have trained and competed in martial arts for years and I dont want to hurt anyone, least of all my beautiful wife.
She knows my buttons, this isnt the first similar situation, she doesnt know when to just leave me alone, she just keeps going, antagonizing me till I lose it.
I feel that she does it on purpose because she knows what the outcome will be and if shes lucky enough I WILL hit her and shes will have everything.
On the other hand, maybe she is like me and just cant control herself enough to back off.
Please help with any experiences and insight, I dont want this to happen again.
Thank you
RG
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