Hello all,
I would like to first start out by saying, I know you probably get people like me all of the time, and have heard similar stories, but I would really just like to get this off of my chest and see what people think.
I am having issues with my father-in-law. I am 27 and my wife is 23. We have been married for almost 5 years and have a good relationship. I think some of this might have to do with how young we/she was when our relationship started.
In any event, my father-in-law is always being critical of me around my wife. He won't do this when I am around, never. He has never brought up any issues he may have with me to my face, instead, he constantly complains about me to my wife. There is nothing I can do ever that will make him happy and stop nagging about me.
This issue has been ongoing for a a good 3 years now, but has escalated lately, as we are getting ready to move quite far from her family. I am already in the new location getting things prepared, and she is now in with her parents until the summer when she can join me. This has caused things to get worse. He complains about me to her, to her mother while she is around, and has even started being critical of me in front of her entire family at family gatherings.
This situation stresses my wife out and makes her depressed. I have told her she needs to stand up for herself/me and defend us. She says things like "you don't know him, that will only make it worse" and "I don't want to cause any drama".
I just wonder what drama she is avoiding? Almost everyday she gets an earful about me, she is living out the drama daily. I feel like she needs to draw some boundaries here. It also concerns me that she seems unwilling to defend me. Maybe this is the man in me, but I feel disrespected and would appreciate my wife standing up for me. If anyone in my family were saying the same things about her, I would be quick to nip it immediately. She seems unwilling to do that, and it hurts me. I would confront him myself, but I don't know if that would be of any help at all, and I do think it is her responsibility regardless.
I would like to let this roll off of my back, but it is getting to the point now where I am irritated, feel disrespected, and hurt that my wife won't stand up for me. Am I just being petty?
I would like to first start out by saying, I know you probably get people like me all of the time, and have heard similar stories, but I would really just like to get this off of my chest and see what people think.
I am having issues with my father-in-law. I am 27 and my wife is 23. We have been married for almost 5 years and have a good relationship. I think some of this might have to do with how young we/she was when our relationship started.
In any event, my father-in-law is always being critical of me around my wife. He won't do this when I am around, never. He has never brought up any issues he may have with me to my face, instead, he constantly complains about me to my wife. There is nothing I can do ever that will make him happy and stop nagging about me.
This issue has been ongoing for a a good 3 years now, but has escalated lately, as we are getting ready to move quite far from her family. I am already in the new location getting things prepared, and she is now in with her parents until the summer when she can join me. This has caused things to get worse. He complains about me to her, to her mother while she is around, and has even started being critical of me in front of her entire family at family gatherings.
This situation stresses my wife out and makes her depressed. I have told her she needs to stand up for herself/me and defend us. She says things like "you don't know him, that will only make it worse" and "I don't want to cause any drama".
I just wonder what drama she is avoiding? Almost everyday she gets an earful about me, she is living out the drama daily. I feel like she needs to draw some boundaries here. It also concerns me that she seems unwilling to defend me. Maybe this is the man in me, but I feel disrespected and would appreciate my wife standing up for me. If anyone in my family were saying the same things about her, I would be quick to nip it immediately. She seems unwilling to do that, and it hurts me. I would confront him myself, but I don't know if that would be of any help at all, and I do think it is her responsibility regardless.
I would like to let this roll off of my back, but it is getting to the point now where I am irritated, feel disrespected, and hurt that my wife won't stand up for me. Am I just being petty?
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