I have been married to my husband for 13 years. I love him dearly...but...it seems like he will never grow up. He'll be 33 this year. He drinks beer constantly. He originally wanted to be a "rock star" so I let him follow his dream. We moved away from our family so he could try and hit the big time with his band. Unfortunately (for him) the band didn't make it and broke up. Since then he either works at a job that he hates and has crappy pay or he has no job at all. Thankfully, I have grown up and acquired a position in a company that allows me to barely keep a roof over our heads and food in our bellies. We have two beautiful children, one is a 14 year old girl, the other a 4 year old boy. I know huge gap. Both of our children would rather spend time with me than their father. He has had his best friend living in our basement for the past year and a half almost rent free. They drink together everyday. I have tried to get my husband to understand that he isn't setting a good example for our children if he constantly has a beer in his hand, but "his father did, and he turned out fine". He also can't seem to hold a job, and certainly not one that pays a decent amount. I've caught him lying to me over stupid things (like sleeping when he should have been looking for a job, or still smoking cigarettes, or spending $100 a month on beer). I have tried explaining to him that I need him to work on these things so we can better our situation and the future for our children, but he just keeps telling me that he's doing the best he can. My question is, am I being unrealistic? Should I just accept things the way they are and work around it? Or should I do something else, and if so, what?
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