wife emotional affair

This is my story my wife and i have been married for almost 2 years, been together for 8. recently things haven't been going well. I work at sea for a living which requires me to be gone from home for long periods of time usually month onboard and month home, but the last 6 months i have been going for longer, due to work changing. I have noticed that we have become distant and she has been spending a lot of time on her cell texting compared to what she used to. A couple days ago i looked into her phone for a number for my aunt and i came across some text messages she was sending to some fella not sure who. She kept asking him if he wanted to do something today, one of these days was a day when we planned to go skiing?there was other things there that suggested she wanted to go farther with things. I couldnt believe it... I have always trusted her a respected her 100%. When i confronted her about this she said nothing sexual happened , which i ful ly belief. She said the reason that she went to him was becuase she didnt feel loved by me over the last while. I know i have my downfalls in communicating and I am a bit old fashion with regards to being romantic. But I am a good person , have a great job, we have no finicial trouble. I don't go out on the town etc. When i am home i do most if not all the house work, always have supper ready etc. The only thing I do is a bit of things in the outdoors such as hunting etc. This i have cut back on in the recent months becuase i sensed it was hurting our marriage. Lately we have been very distant and she won't let me get close at all. I am very hurt by all of this and not sure what to do. I tried to get her to go to a therapist etc but thats not a option. She says I don't put enough effort into our marriage. Throughout our relationship my wife has always been easily agitated and i accepted this but its getting out of hand now. I do love my wife and we have had some great times. But some things throughout our marriage tell me she never really wanted it deep down as she has never gotten any wedding pictures developed, when i ask her she says you go and do it. I have done a lot of reading on the net about everything with regards to helping our marriage. I need to listen better, and become more emotionally connected but when i try this she seems to push me away. Is this gone to far or??????She doesnt show any remorse for talking to / seeing someone else. should she???? Not sure what to do....Thanks for your time and allowing me to vent... I really do love my wife...

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