Good Afternoon,
I'm in need of sound advice. I'll get straight to the point. I'm married to a man who has proven to be a hazard to my sanity AND health. After realizing I've done all that I can to save/repair the marriage, I've asked for a divorce. I've tried to move past lying, cheating, deception, homemade porn videos (I found TWO in his phone) and even an STD that he did not pass on to me (I tested negative after several blood tests)! He seems to get a thrill off of being deceitful and is a pathological liar. I've finally had to come to terms with the fact that the man I've known since childhood is deeply disturbed and is a threat to my well being.
About two weeks ago I asked for a divorce because I just can't do it anymore. We moved into a 2/2 condo in June of this year. The rent is $1,250. I can foot it on my own but things would be extremely tight for my daughter and I. So, I told him that we need to fulfill our obligation to the lease agreement, line our ducks up and prepare to go our separate ways once the lease is done (by that time we should be legally divorced, also).
Here is where I would like advice. I have a 4-year old daughter. A very intelligent 4-year old daughter. I know she senses that their is a problem. Him and I no longer sleep in the same room - she has taken notice of it. We no longer kiss/hug - she has taken notice of it. What do I do to protect her??? Or, should I be trying to? Also, how do I establish boundaries in a shared space? Example: Him and I shared a bathroom and my daughter had her own. I've given our bathroom to him (so, he can start being responsible for maintaining/cleaning his own space) and I use hers. So, I guess my question is, do I split the condo in half: Me and her space / his space?
I've realized that for a long time, he's been manipulating the hell out of me and I've been mistaking it for love. This has been the only relationship I've had and I'm really disappointed on how much time I've wasted on such a loser. I'm in the process of seeking therapy because I'm not sure what I'm lacking within myself that I allowed him to mentally and emotionally abuse me for so long. Right now, I'm trying to grasp how to live with a person I'm divorcing and nearly hate for the next few months while trying not to have a negative impact on my daughter outside of her realizing her parents are separating?
I'm in need of sound advice. I'll get straight to the point. I'm married to a man who has proven to be a hazard to my sanity AND health. After realizing I've done all that I can to save/repair the marriage, I've asked for a divorce. I've tried to move past lying, cheating, deception, homemade porn videos (I found TWO in his phone) and even an STD that he did not pass on to me (I tested negative after several blood tests)! He seems to get a thrill off of being deceitful and is a pathological liar. I've finally had to come to terms with the fact that the man I've known since childhood is deeply disturbed and is a threat to my well being.
About two weeks ago I asked for a divorce because I just can't do it anymore. We moved into a 2/2 condo in June of this year. The rent is $1,250. I can foot it on my own but things would be extremely tight for my daughter and I. So, I told him that we need to fulfill our obligation to the lease agreement, line our ducks up and prepare to go our separate ways once the lease is done (by that time we should be legally divorced, also).
Here is where I would like advice. I have a 4-year old daughter. A very intelligent 4-year old daughter. I know she senses that their is a problem. Him and I no longer sleep in the same room - she has taken notice of it. We no longer kiss/hug - she has taken notice of it. What do I do to protect her??? Or, should I be trying to? Also, how do I establish boundaries in a shared space? Example: Him and I shared a bathroom and my daughter had her own. I've given our bathroom to him (so, he can start being responsible for maintaining/cleaning his own space) and I use hers. So, I guess my question is, do I split the condo in half: Me and her space / his space?
I've realized that for a long time, he's been manipulating the hell out of me and I've been mistaking it for love. This has been the only relationship I've had and I'm really disappointed on how much time I've wasted on such a loser. I'm in the process of seeking therapy because I'm not sure what I'm lacking within myself that I allowed him to mentally and emotionally abuse me for so long. Right now, I'm trying to grasp how to live with a person I'm divorcing and nearly hate for the next few months while trying not to have a negative impact on my daughter outside of her realizing her parents are separating?
Put the internet to work for you.
No comments:
Post a Comment