Hi Guys,
I've been confused in the last month or so with my sexuality. I'm a seventeen year old girl in long term relationship with a guy.
My boyfriend and I have been together two years and we haven't had sex yet there are reasons i understand and won't go into on this forum. However I will say the lack of sex is not on my part, and I have been open about my desire for it. I adore my boyfriend and I am sexually attracted to him when we kiss.
My issue recently has been that I have been having dreams about girls. I've never considered myself a lesbian or even bi in the past. I've never had a crush on a girl and when I was younger I had crushes on guys and male celebrities. Although I do watch lesbian porn, it's only (I think) because it is less aggressive that other types, but I do watch them as well. I read erotica from time to time but that is 99% heterosexual.
These thoughts about girls have worried me because I don't want to be untrue to myself. I've never imagined myself with a girl in a long term relationship, or had any desire to kiss any of my friends who are girls. I'm an outrageous flirt with guys (my boyfriend knows and is fine with it.) however the thoughts about girls are passing. I can think about kissing a girl and be moved by it, but it's only in a one off situation (i think).
I have more dreams about having sex with girls than guys. In public, I look at guys and girls but I thought I was doing it in a comparison way before with other girls.
With guys I can imagine being with them, and I find them attractive but I have to get to know them before I am sexually attracted to them. My boyfriend isn't conventionally attractive (non of my celebrity crushes are really) but I love him and his personality is a turn on, as well as his appearance.
I know this post probably doesn't make much sense but it would really help if someone replied.
I'm not homophobic in any way. I have extremely close friends who are LGBT+ and because of my mums profession I am active during pride spreading awareness of HIV/AIDS, and supporting charities. My problem is that I don't want to be untrue to myself but I don't know how to describe myself.
Put the internet to work for you.
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