What would make you want to get back together with your ex?
Here is the background. Married for 24 years. Two great successful adult children. No infidelity, no abuse, no drugs or drinking. Several major problems, financial, job/career related/empty nest that ran concurrently and caused me to become very depressed, withdrawn and generally unhappy with myself and life in general.
Since my wife decided to seek a dissolution most of these issues have been resolved almost entirely to be benefit. I have a new job with a steady paycheck that I really like. I gave up owning my own business with its unsteady cash/work flow and seemingly ever increasing levels of stress. I sold the old house that had become a money pit and source of major stress and time. The combination of these two resolved my financial issues and I now live less than 20 minutes from my daughter (who had moved 2.5 hours away and was the source of my empty nest.
My wife told me she no longer loved me because I was not the man she married. And I wasn't. Nor do I want to be. I didn't particularly like that guy either. I want to be better than that guy. I love my wife and I love my family and want to make them whole again. We have filed the dissolution papers and it is set to finalize next month. I realize that our old relationship had to end because I wasn't happy and that was making her unhappy or vice versa. I know she is not blameless, but feel all of this could have been avoided if only I had been dragged out of the hole I dug myself into earlier.
She has previously told me that she isn't making any promises but that if I can get better we could become friends again, If that happens who knows where it could lead. My daughter asked her to give me a chance and she only said she wasn't making any promises. To me that means it is up to me. So please any and all advice is appreciated!
As I said almost all of my stressors are gone and I am making every effort to regain the lost me and recreate a better me. So, what can I do to keep the spark from flickering out as I continue to recover and remake myself. Nothing in the world would make me happier than to rekindle a relationship with the mother of my children and the love of my life.
Here is the background. Married for 24 years. Two great successful adult children. No infidelity, no abuse, no drugs or drinking. Several major problems, financial, job/career related/empty nest that ran concurrently and caused me to become very depressed, withdrawn and generally unhappy with myself and life in general.
Since my wife decided to seek a dissolution most of these issues have been resolved almost entirely to be benefit. I have a new job with a steady paycheck that I really like. I gave up owning my own business with its unsteady cash/work flow and seemingly ever increasing levels of stress. I sold the old house that had become a money pit and source of major stress and time. The combination of these two resolved my financial issues and I now live less than 20 minutes from my daughter (who had moved 2.5 hours away and was the source of my empty nest.
My wife told me she no longer loved me because I was not the man she married. And I wasn't. Nor do I want to be. I didn't particularly like that guy either. I want to be better than that guy. I love my wife and I love my family and want to make them whole again. We have filed the dissolution papers and it is set to finalize next month. I realize that our old relationship had to end because I wasn't happy and that was making her unhappy or vice versa. I know she is not blameless, but feel all of this could have been avoided if only I had been dragged out of the hole I dug myself into earlier.
She has previously told me that she isn't making any promises but that if I can get better we could become friends again, If that happens who knows where it could lead. My daughter asked her to give me a chance and she only said she wasn't making any promises. To me that means it is up to me. So please any and all advice is appreciated!
As I said almost all of my stressors are gone and I am making every effort to regain the lost me and recreate a better me. So, what can I do to keep the spark from flickering out as I continue to recover and remake myself. Nothing in the world would make me happier than to rekindle a relationship with the mother of my children and the love of my life.
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