Hi everyone!
So I've been with my boyfriend almost 1.5 years and we moved in together 2 months ago. Everything's going great, but one thing that's getting me down is how different our social lives are.
My bf has a good number of friends, but he barely ever makes plans to see them. Some of them are ridiculously unreliable so I can see why he wouldn't want to make so many plans with them, but he has some that aren't unreliable too. He says he's not really much of a social guy and would rather stay at home and chill or work on his music. That's fair enough, of course, but the problem is that I love going out and meeting up with friends so I'm doing things most nights, especially at the weekend.
I obviously enjoying hanging out with him (hence us being together), but sometimes I just want to hang out with my mates at the weekend and have some time to myself, but the thing is that he won't have made any plans at the weekend so I feel like I kind of have to invite him along with us because I'd hate the thought of him sitting alone at home (even though he says he's ok with this, but sometimes I'm not so sure).
My friends say they're ok with this, but as my bf is super shy he'll just kind of sit there and not say much (he even fell asleep last time we went to a bar which was kind of embarrassing). I then feel torn because I have to make sure he's ok, but then I also want to let loose and have a cool time with my friends.
I recently started a new job and am trying to fit in as much as possible there. They keep organising meet-ups and parties so I'm trying to go to as many as I can, but I don't usually invite my bf as I think work things should maybe be separate, plus I don't want to be 'the girl who can't possibly spend an evening away from her bf' or anything. So this means he's going to be sat at home alone while I'm at these work things. I do feel guilty about that even though he tells me it's fine and that I should just go and enjoy myself.
I guess I've just noticed this more since we've been living together because I know he'll ALWAYS be there when I get home from work which is a good thing, but also annoying at times because I just want to chill out after a long day and have some alone time. In the 6 weeks we've lived together I realised I've only been in the flat alone for 2 hours!
I'm not sure how much of this makes sense. Sorry it's long. I just wondered if I should just accept the fact that he says he's ok when I go out without him or if I can persuade him to get in touch with his friends more without him thinking I'm trying to say I want to spend less time with him. I just think it's good to be apart for a while then you appreciate each other more. My friend says I should just keep going to things by myself so he'll get the hint and realise he has to make plans too if he starts getting bored at home.
Thanks for reading :)
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