I got into a relationship with my ex-girlfriend when we were 17 (we're 21 now) and for the first couple of years it was really good. then in our third year things in both our lives got on top of us, we were being petty over stupid little things and arguing for the sake of arguing sometimes, so we decided to end it. We wanted to be friends but I couldn't handle being in contact with her, so I stopped talking to her. Bit of a dick move I know but I didn't know what else to do. My feelings didn't go away but everything just got easier, I could get on with day to day stuff again without constantly.
A few months later we were both at a party and we caught each others eye and all my feelings came flooding back. We went outside to talk and we ended up chatting all night in my car and I took her home the next morning. I basically told her I was still in love with her and I'd sorted my life out so I thought we could go back to our old selves. She'd met someone else the week before who she had feelings for and said, while she still had feelings for me, she didn't know if she still loved me and the fact that she liked this other guy confused her even more.
Over the next few months leading up to christmas just gone we went out a few times and even got a bit physical, though we didn't have sex. Just before christmas I found out she was also meeting up with this guy at uni but so far she had only kissed him.
Fast forward to last weekend. We had been out a couple of times more (she's away at Uni so we didn't see each other much) but the physical side had stopped apart from the odd kiss she gave me and then said she regretted. She told me over the phone that in the few weeks just gone they'd "done nearly everything but had sex" a few times, and it absolutely destroyed me inside. She said it was because she was lonely. I told her I just wanted to get over her and move on now and that I didn't want her to message me because it would make me feel worse.
A few hours later she texted me saying she still loved me and wanted to try again.
I don't know what to do, I'm not even sure how I feel anymore. We'd only ever been with each other and I guess I just saw her as 'special' because of that, and I'm scared that's not going to be there. She still see's this guy as well, goes out with him at the weekend and stuff, and that's probably going to make me jealous and paranoid. Then I think maybe I was just some kind of fallback after she was done at Uni, it's just convenient she realised this only after I said I wanted to walk away. I'm also scared if I did walk away, I'd never quite have the connection with her with someone else. Until the last part of our relationship, we just clicked. The idea of her cheating on me never even occurred to me, she was the one I wanted to be with forever.
I just don't know. I have a lot of built up anger and sadness, I can't concentrate on work and just basically feel like ****. Advice please? What would you do, what do you think etc...?
A few months later we were both at a party and we caught each others eye and all my feelings came flooding back. We went outside to talk and we ended up chatting all night in my car and I took her home the next morning. I basically told her I was still in love with her and I'd sorted my life out so I thought we could go back to our old selves. She'd met someone else the week before who she had feelings for and said, while she still had feelings for me, she didn't know if she still loved me and the fact that she liked this other guy confused her even more.
Over the next few months leading up to christmas just gone we went out a few times and even got a bit physical, though we didn't have sex. Just before christmas I found out she was also meeting up with this guy at uni but so far she had only kissed him.
Fast forward to last weekend. We had been out a couple of times more (she's away at Uni so we didn't see each other much) but the physical side had stopped apart from the odd kiss she gave me and then said she regretted. She told me over the phone that in the few weeks just gone they'd "done nearly everything but had sex" a few times, and it absolutely destroyed me inside. She said it was because she was lonely. I told her I just wanted to get over her and move on now and that I didn't want her to message me because it would make me feel worse.
A few hours later she texted me saying she still loved me and wanted to try again.
I don't know what to do, I'm not even sure how I feel anymore. We'd only ever been with each other and I guess I just saw her as 'special' because of that, and I'm scared that's not going to be there. She still see's this guy as well, goes out with him at the weekend and stuff, and that's probably going to make me jealous and paranoid. Then I think maybe I was just some kind of fallback after she was done at Uni, it's just convenient she realised this only after I said I wanted to walk away. I'm also scared if I did walk away, I'd never quite have the connection with her with someone else. Until the last part of our relationship, we just clicked. The idea of her cheating on me never even occurred to me, she was the one I wanted to be with forever.
I just don't know. I have a lot of built up anger and sadness, I can't concentrate on work and just basically feel like ****. Advice please? What would you do, what do you think etc...?
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