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here's a story all about how my life got flipped turned upside down

so basically I am considering divorce. {story} My husband cheated and I seriously dont want to try to work it out. its been 2 years, he cheated and lied, got a std test, maybe 11 months later I found out he was still contacting escorts I couldnt find money missing that time so I let it go when he said he didnt do something. So after that I went into roommate mode, didnt trust the ground he stood on. He tried to change it up and he was dating me, helpful and attentive, 2 months later it faded away. Im still not trying to be affectionate at all but we did have sex occasionally when i felts the relationship was slightly getting better. Got pregnant, sigh, spermicide doesnt work until 15 min after insertion, learned that the hard way. I'm upset because I didnt want to be adding to a broken marriage. He suggest I abort the baby if i really didnt want to be with him. Thats too extreme for me, even if i dont like you im not going to do that. But according to him me keeping the baby meant I wanted to be with him forever. While pregnant I realized that when he was caught I missed looking at one of the bank accounts. he refuses to let me see, I with hold all affection because there is a reason he wont let me see. He says no, there is nothing and I want to prove that I can go without sex plus you seeing the account doesnt promise me that you will stay. I made to decision that I dont want to go through another pregnancy again ever! So I got my tubes tied and before I made the decision he was saying he was willing to get a vasectomy but only if I stayed married to him because he really doesnt want to do it. I told him a vasectomy is a personal decision and he needs to ask himself if we divorce would you want more children? He said he might want more kids so I said well there is your vasectomy answer! Another excuse he gave was that he was willing to show me the account one day but I'm not giving him a reason because im not trying to wor k on the marriage. it all sounds like bulls**t to me im not happy and I dont feel like working on anything if its still secrets in the closet 2 years later. UGHHH!! thoughts?


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