A couple of months ago, my girlfriend and I were in a rough patch. Our communication had gotten stale, and we were not really expressing emotion for each other (probably both related). During this time, she decided to meet up with someone she had met online. According to her, they had a couple of dates and kissed. We have moved past a lot of it, and I have decided – at least for now – to just believe her. Believe that she's being truthful with me, and that the extent of her cheating was limited to kissing one individual on multiple occasions. Even with all this in motion, with all of the wonderful things she has done to help us, and with our moving forward in a lot of ways, I'm still having great difficulty with one thing:
I cannot bring myself to kiss her. We will lightly kiss, but not really Kiss.
Next to sexual intimacies, kissing was the most intense, special and loving thing we shared… that I have ever shared with anyone ever, actually. We would look forward to it when we were apart, and when we were together we couldn't get enough of it. That all died the moment she took that incredibly intimate and special piece of us that we perfected (with each other), and shared it with a random internet scoundrel. She took something that was so immensely centric and important to us, and gave it away like it meant nothing. As I said, we had reached a rough spot, but we were still together, I loved her, and was envisioning and working toward a life together. In contrast, this other guy just wanted to get into the pants of another pretty face. He was some loser internet player who had 260+ online 'friends', virtually all of them local, female and single. Once my girlfriend was gone, he picked right up chatting away on his page with other potential targets.
Our kisses meant the world to me. Now they mean nothing, and I want that to change. I would love to hear from people who have been on either side of this situation.
– If you cheated, what did you do to help restore your partner's desire for the intimate and special feelings that were lost?
– If you were cheated on, what helped to restore your wanting to share moments like the above with your partner? What did it take for you to kiss them and again feel closeness, Love, and happiness, as opposed to emptiness over what was stolen, disgust for what happened, and repulsion for how low they allowed their self to sink?
Kissing feels hollow now. I want to feel like I'm kissing the Love of my life again.
– DNJ
I cannot bring myself to kiss her. We will lightly kiss, but not really Kiss.
Next to sexual intimacies, kissing was the most intense, special and loving thing we shared… that I have ever shared with anyone ever, actually. We would look forward to it when we were apart, and when we were together we couldn't get enough of it. That all died the moment she took that incredibly intimate and special piece of us that we perfected (with each other), and shared it with a random internet scoundrel. She took something that was so immensely centric and important to us, and gave it away like it meant nothing. As I said, we had reached a rough spot, but we were still together, I loved her, and was envisioning and working toward a life together. In contrast, this other guy just wanted to get into the pants of another pretty face. He was some loser internet player who had 260+ online 'friends', virtually all of them local, female and single. Once my girlfriend was gone, he picked right up chatting away on his page with other potential targets.
Our kisses meant the world to me. Now they mean nothing, and I want that to change. I would love to hear from people who have been on either side of this situation.
– If you cheated, what did you do to help restore your partner's desire for the intimate and special feelings that were lost?
– If you were cheated on, what helped to restore your wanting to share moments like the above with your partner? What did it take for you to kiss them and again feel closeness, Love, and happiness, as opposed to emptiness over what was stolen, disgust for what happened, and repulsion for how low they allowed their self to sink?
Kissing feels hollow now. I want to feel like I'm kissing the Love of my life again.
– DNJ
Put the internet to work for you.
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