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Wondering who could be his girlfriend for 4 years

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There's a guy I'm casually dating (exclusively) who had a girlfriend up until last year for 4 years. Thing is I've no idea how she put up with him for that long. Obviously given that I feel that way I shouldn't be involved with him but tbh I'm lonely and somewhat attached. He is utterly immature despite being 25 years old. He plays stupid manipulative games and when I call out his bad behavior he gets defensive and angry instead of actually listening to my criticisms - e.g. I tried to tell him that I was unhappy about him not talking to me for ages and he made out like I was being clingy and unreasonable even though it was ****ing ages, and it ended up being *me* apologizing. Is the reason he's such a dick that he doesn't respect me because he senses that I have low self worth? Is it cos he thinks I'm a slut for having sex with him outside of a proper relationship? IDK I really wonder about his ex, I don't even know her name, but presumably she exists.

Has anyone else here had experience with dating an ******* who made you wonder if it's something about you that causes them to treat you badly, or if they treat women (or men) badly in general in romantic contexts? Some guys talk about how they've treated girls badly in the past due to not valuing them cos they're slutty or whatever, but upon meeting 'nice' girls they say they're gonna stop acting like dicks and I read those comments with some skepticism. Surely if you're a misogynist or ******* you're a misogynist or *******. But IDK.

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