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Exchanging Kids

Going through a divorce after 19 years of marriage. We have an 8 year old and 14 year old. My question is: How do you exchange kids? Do you allow your stbx to knock on the door? Do they wait in the car and kids go to them? Do you go to a neutral location?

We separated due to his affair and he moved out. I really don't like when he walks up to my door to pick-up the kids. I've asked him to wait in the car, but continues to knock on the door because he says the kids need help with their bags. Should I be more assertive about my request or do I just let it go?

Any advice would be appreciated.

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