Not in front of the children

We are 6 days after a major blowup and things are still tense. In the car today he starts in with "I want to tell you my perspective" and I can feel he is about to launch into a whole speech. I say "Perhaps we should have this conversation without our daughter" because the 8yo is in the back seat. He continues "I just want to tell you my perspective" and he goes on to tell me how I am:

- enabling my teenager daughter
- encouraging her to be negative towards him
- that he is supportive of all of us
- that he never buys anything for himself so we can have more
- that I am being totally unfair to him

I don't respond, because (a) that will start a big fight and (b) I am about to be dropped off to work. I am silent. Because I don't think it is fair to tell him that:

- I love and accept my teenager for who she is
- my daughter feels negative towards him because of her own feelings about his own behaviour and I have nothing to do with it
- he may not buy clothes but he has a $60/week poker habit which is more free cash than I spend on myself
- that I feel I am being manipulated and set up by him starting this conversation in front of our daughter

Looking for perspective here. Was he being unfair to launch this in front of our child? I think it was totally inappropriate for him to air his perspective on our marriage & issues in front of her.

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