Not sure if this is the best forum for this, but was wondering if any men have ever been tempted to end a marriage, because of new feelings you start having for another person?
A little background... I've been married for over 12 years. We have no kids. My wife is an absolute sweetheart and she is very good to me. However, our sex life is terrible. To be honest we've had a nearly sex-free marriage for almost as long as we've been together. The past few years it's probably 4-5x per year. We've discussed this issue but it never seems to help. At any rate I think the bigger issue is that we are more like great friends/roomates than a couple "in love", I think. I do find my wife to be very pretty but to be honest there has never been a lot of physical chemistry between us. I don't think she is particularly physically attracted to me, and she seems like she would be perfectly fine if I never initiated sex at all. She does love me I think, I make her laugh and try my best to be a good partner.
So anyway recently I met another woman through work, and the feelings I have for her hit me like a ton of bricks. It's complete and total attraction in every way. I've always worked with a lot of women so it's not like I'm falling for every beautiful woman I meet. But I have never experienced feelings like this.
She knows I am married of course (she is single). I am almost certain the attraction is mutual but of course I could be misreading things. We never act inappropriately and I've never told her my feelings. Regardless, the feelings I am having are making me doubt my marriage. Even if this woman did not share my feelings for her... the fact that I am feeling this way, when I never felt anything like this for my wife, has me doubting pretty much everything at this point. I am starting to wonder if my wife and I are really just friends at this point, and if maybe that's what we were meant to be. I also know this could just be a stupid crush, that the rush I am feeling now will eventually fade, and that jeopardizing my marriage over it could be supremely ridiculous.
I guess I'm just asking if any other guys have had a similar experience after many years of marriage, and if you've ever made a decision you regretted (whether you chose to end your marriage, or whether you decided to stay and try to make things work). I'm not asking about cheating - I would never cheat on my wife, she is a great person and doesn't deserve it. And I kind of hate the cliche of "I love my wife but I'm not IN LOVE with her", but that is how I am feeling these days. I often feel that might be how my wife feels about me as well.
A little background... I've been married for over 12 years. We have no kids. My wife is an absolute sweetheart and she is very good to me. However, our sex life is terrible. To be honest we've had a nearly sex-free marriage for almost as long as we've been together. The past few years it's probably 4-5x per year. We've discussed this issue but it never seems to help. At any rate I think the bigger issue is that we are more like great friends/roomates than a couple "in love", I think. I do find my wife to be very pretty but to be honest there has never been a lot of physical chemistry between us. I don't think she is particularly physically attracted to me, and she seems like she would be perfectly fine if I never initiated sex at all. She does love me I think, I make her laugh and try my best to be a good partner.
So anyway recently I met another woman through work, and the feelings I have for her hit me like a ton of bricks. It's complete and total attraction in every way. I've always worked with a lot of women so it's not like I'm falling for every beautiful woman I meet. But I have never experienced feelings like this.
She knows I am married of course (she is single). I am almost certain the attraction is mutual but of course I could be misreading things. We never act inappropriately and I've never told her my feelings. Regardless, the feelings I am having are making me doubt my marriage. Even if this woman did not share my feelings for her... the fact that I am feeling this way, when I never felt anything like this for my wife, has me doubting pretty much everything at this point. I am starting to wonder if my wife and I are really just friends at this point, and if maybe that's what we were meant to be. I also know this could just be a stupid crush, that the rush I am feeling now will eventually fade, and that jeopardizing my marriage over it could be supremely ridiculous.
I guess I'm just asking if any other guys have had a similar experience after many years of marriage, and if you've ever made a decision you regretted (whether you chose to end your marriage, or whether you decided to stay and try to make things work). I'm not asking about cheating - I would never cheat on my wife, she is a great person and doesn't deserve it. And I kind of hate the cliche of "I love my wife but I'm not IN LOVE with her", but that is how I am feeling these days. I often feel that might be how my wife feels about me as well.
Put the internet to work for you.
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