Hi all,
I am looking for some advice, opinions and to just vent...
My STBXW and I have been living separately for 4 months now. We still havent finalised the financial settlement so technically we still have joint marital assets etc.
My main problem is around the ex and her not understanding that we are not friends anymore. She cant seem to differentiate between the relationship I have and want with my children and the relationship I dont want with her...
For example, I spent today with my kids. We had fun, went out you know - good stuff. I take them to her place (formerly our home) to drop them off and...
She has been drinking (surprise surprise). I tell her about what the kids did etc. Even show her some pics on my phone. She scrolls to a pic of something else and asks where I took it. I reply 'that's none of your business'.
She then proceeds to tell me to 'get out' and 'kids, daddy is leaving now'. This upsets the kids and they cry a bit. I kiss them goodbye and leave.
I then text her telling her:
"I am happy to discuss what the children have been doing but you gave up the right to know what I do in my personal life."
She then replies with many messages...
"you are not welcome in this house"... blah blah
"I thought we could get on for these children, however you have proved that it is not possible. I try to talk to you etc."
I haven't bothered replying further, as much as I want to I know it is a waste of time.
So what are others thoughts. The personal crap? I dont care what she does, whether she gets some crappy jacket on sale etc. I also feel that she has no right to know what I am up to when I don't have the kids with me.
I care what the kids are up to and that is the only reason I still talk to her at all... if we didn't have kids together I would never talk to her again. She seems to have a sense of entitlement, like I should still care about her and her life the way it was when we were together.
So what do you do with your ex? Are you "friends"? The friends thing can never work as far as I am concerned. I am too angry, I can barely look at her...
How do you handle the change over between mummy and daddy's place?
Any other tips for making the change over smooth... I dont want my kids being upset, they don't deserve it.
I am looking for some advice, opinions and to just vent...
My STBXW and I have been living separately for 4 months now. We still havent finalised the financial settlement so technically we still have joint marital assets etc.
My main problem is around the ex and her not understanding that we are not friends anymore. She cant seem to differentiate between the relationship I have and want with my children and the relationship I dont want with her...
For example, I spent today with my kids. We had fun, went out you know - good stuff. I take them to her place (formerly our home) to drop them off and...
She has been drinking (surprise surprise). I tell her about what the kids did etc. Even show her some pics on my phone. She scrolls to a pic of something else and asks where I took it. I reply 'that's none of your business'.
She then proceeds to tell me to 'get out' and 'kids, daddy is leaving now'. This upsets the kids and they cry a bit. I kiss them goodbye and leave.
I then text her telling her:
"I am happy to discuss what the children have been doing but you gave up the right to know what I do in my personal life."
She then replies with many messages...
"you are not welcome in this house"... blah blah
"I thought we could get on for these children, however you have proved that it is not possible. I try to talk to you etc."
I haven't bothered replying further, as much as I want to I know it is a waste of time.
So what are others thoughts. The personal crap? I dont care what she does, whether she gets some crappy jacket on sale etc. I also feel that she has no right to know what I am up to when I don't have the kids with me.
I care what the kids are up to and that is the only reason I still talk to her at all... if we didn't have kids together I would never talk to her again. She seems to have a sense of entitlement, like I should still care about her and her life the way it was when we were together.
So what do you do with your ex? Are you "friends"? The friends thing can never work as far as I am concerned. I am too angry, I can barely look at her...
How do you handle the change over between mummy and daddy's place?
Any other tips for making the change over smooth... I dont want my kids being upset, they don't deserve it.
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