| Hey! So I've known for a while now that I'm gay. This isn't a how-do-I-stop-these-feelings thread - I may be closeted but I'm not misinformed. I know that this isn't a choice and there's really nothing I can do about it. I am who I am. But I have no interest in living like this. Women don't attract me, sexually, anymore. I have been involved with women in the past, but it's never felt 'right' and after a lot of soul searching and a relationship gone sour with my ex, I now know that I was the one with the issues all along. However, I have no interest in coming out of the closet, at least not at the moment or in the forseeable future. I have a whole host of reasons for this, primarily familial and cultural, that I'd rather not try to disentangle or fight. I'm still in uni, but I have a job lined up that doesn't start until 2015. I'm trying to find constant work to always keep me occupied 24/7 and projects and educational and social excursions. I go to the gym 5 times a week now and watch more TV than ever before. Basically, I'm afraid to take it slow for too long because I'm afraid that the reality of how much I've cut myself off from my close friends and family will come crashing down on me and I'll have some kind of breakdown, which I would rather avoid as well. My question is this: What can I do to enable myself to live alone and be happy with that? What are the best ways to keep myself occupied indefinitely until the Fall of 2015? | |||
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