About 2 months ago I caught my wife in a park with another man. She said that they were just friends. He was going through a divorce and she had just been there talking and trying to help. She agreed that this was very inappropriate and that she would stop this immediately and not let this happen again. This was really hard for me to believe but I eventually got over it and believed her.
I continued to live my life for about 2-3 more weeks. I was feeling like something was still not right so I checked our phone records and found that my wife had been calling and texting the same number several times a day. I confronted her. At first she said she didn't know what the number was. She eventually admitted that it was the same guy in the park. My wife goes to college and has a class with this guy. She claimed that they were just friends and she just really likes talking to him. Nothing inappropriate was going on. I was really upset and really had a hard time believing this. I told her that even if nothing inappropriate was going on that I was not ok with them talking like this. She said that she would end it and stop talking to him. And of course I believed her.
So things seemed like they got better and I was actually believing that it had ended. 3 days go by. I was getting suspicious again and checked her facebook account and saw that they were still communicating through facebook. I saw a few messages where he would say that he "loved her" This hurt very much. I confronted my wife once again. I freaked out at her and called her many bad names and told her that I wanted a divorce. She got very upset and said that she was really sorry. She doesn't know why she keeps communicating with him. She told me that she didn't want me to leave and she wanted to make things right. She said that she never said that she loved him and nothing more than just talking has ever happened. It took me a few days but I finally calmed down and believed that it was finally over this time. I felt like I finally got the message across to her and she would stop.
A few more days pass and I get suspicious once again. I wake up around 3:00am and get her phone while she is sleeping. I check her phone out and realize that they have still been talking. She was texting his phone with her email account. She had said multiple time that she "loved him" and he had said it back. I was able to read the entire discussion. It made me sick. She would say that she missed him so much and counts down the days when she can see him again. I confronted her once again. This time it was really bad. I told her I was leaving for sure this time. She was very upset and said sorry over and over. She couldn't explain why she would tell him that she loved him and other things that she wrote.
During this time we had a vacation planned together with our 4 year old daughter. She ended up not going but ended up staying in her parents house for about a week. While we were away from each other we talked a lot and I had it in my mind that I was leaving her. During this time she admitted that she kissed him a handful of times in his car at a Target Parking lot. She said it never went farther that making out. They didn't touch each other inappropriately or anything like that. But they had been making out every week for the last 4 or 5 weeks.
I was crushed to hear this. I never thought that this would happen to me. Our marriage was good. We were not really struggling or anything like that. We have been trying to get pregnant for about 2 years unsuccessfully. She blamed this fact as to why she had been struggling calling it a "mid life crises" She claimed that she never meant for this affair to happen but it just did through small baby steps. She said that she loved me and wants her family. Not him.
After I caught her the 4th time I called this guys up and chewed him out and threatened to beat him to a bloody pulp if he ever makes contact with my wife again. I made my wife stop school and she said that she called him one last time and ended it.
I have noticed a change in her since this last time. I feel like I finally have my wife back. She acted different during this whole thing and now she seem like her old self. I want to believe that she is really done this time but I am having a hard time really believing it. Each time I caught her she got better at hiding it. She opened up several different emails and different apps including snapchat to hide what she was doing.
She now says that she does not use any of these things anymore and she is done. For sure this time. She has on multiple times bared her soul to me reassuring its over. That she wants me and her family. She wants us to be a family.
Im struggling with a lot of things right now. We are currently living with each other and our daughter. I am trying to get over this. Its been about 2 weeks since the last contact they supposivly have had. I have not been able to find any more evidence of them talking.
*I had to catch her in the act 4 different times. Each time she would lie to me and say it was over just for me to find that it was still going on. (she even lied about them making out until the very end)
*She did this while we were doing In Uterine Insemination (IUI). (we were really trying to have a baby and spending a lot of money to do so)
*She made out with the guy on several different occasions. (claims they never had sex)
*While this was all going on she continued to have sex with me and would even go on dates with me to assure me this was all over. (she was very convincing) Part of the reason I believed her each time.
I just feel like she is a liar. I don't know if I will ever be able to trust her again. I feel hurt that she would do this to me. She can't even explain why and she says she is very ashamed of herself.
She really wants me to stay but I just don't know what to do. If we didn't have a 4 year old child I don't think I would stay. But I cant bare the idea of not raising my child and only seeing her every other weekend.
Need Advice
I continued to live my life for about 2-3 more weeks. I was feeling like something was still not right so I checked our phone records and found that my wife had been calling and texting the same number several times a day. I confronted her. At first she said she didn't know what the number was. She eventually admitted that it was the same guy in the park. My wife goes to college and has a class with this guy. She claimed that they were just friends and she just really likes talking to him. Nothing inappropriate was going on. I was really upset and really had a hard time believing this. I told her that even if nothing inappropriate was going on that I was not ok with them talking like this. She said that she would end it and stop talking to him. And of course I believed her.
So things seemed like they got better and I was actually believing that it had ended. 3 days go by. I was getting suspicious again and checked her facebook account and saw that they were still communicating through facebook. I saw a few messages where he would say that he "loved her" This hurt very much. I confronted my wife once again. I freaked out at her and called her many bad names and told her that I wanted a divorce. She got very upset and said that she was really sorry. She doesn't know why she keeps communicating with him. She told me that she didn't want me to leave and she wanted to make things right. She said that she never said that she loved him and nothing more than just talking has ever happened. It took me a few days but I finally calmed down and believed that it was finally over this time. I felt like I finally got the message across to her and she would stop.
A few more days pass and I get suspicious once again. I wake up around 3:00am and get her phone while she is sleeping. I check her phone out and realize that they have still been talking. She was texting his phone with her email account. She had said multiple time that she "loved him" and he had said it back. I was able to read the entire discussion. It made me sick. She would say that she missed him so much and counts down the days when she can see him again. I confronted her once again. This time it was really bad. I told her I was leaving for sure this time. She was very upset and said sorry over and over. She couldn't explain why she would tell him that she loved him and other things that she wrote.
During this time we had a vacation planned together with our 4 year old daughter. She ended up not going but ended up staying in her parents house for about a week. While we were away from each other we talked a lot and I had it in my mind that I was leaving her. During this time she admitted that she kissed him a handful of times in his car at a Target Parking lot. She said it never went farther that making out. They didn't touch each other inappropriately or anything like that. But they had been making out every week for the last 4 or 5 weeks.
I was crushed to hear this. I never thought that this would happen to me. Our marriage was good. We were not really struggling or anything like that. We have been trying to get pregnant for about 2 years unsuccessfully. She blamed this fact as to why she had been struggling calling it a "mid life crises" She claimed that she never meant for this affair to happen but it just did through small baby steps. She said that she loved me and wants her family. Not him.
After I caught her the 4th time I called this guys up and chewed him out and threatened to beat him to a bloody pulp if he ever makes contact with my wife again. I made my wife stop school and she said that she called him one last time and ended it.
I have noticed a change in her since this last time. I feel like I finally have my wife back. She acted different during this whole thing and now she seem like her old self. I want to believe that she is really done this time but I am having a hard time really believing it. Each time I caught her she got better at hiding it. She opened up several different emails and different apps including snapchat to hide what she was doing.
She now says that she does not use any of these things anymore and she is done. For sure this time. She has on multiple times bared her soul to me reassuring its over. That she wants me and her family. She wants us to be a family.
Im struggling with a lot of things right now. We are currently living with each other and our daughter. I am trying to get over this. Its been about 2 weeks since the last contact they supposivly have had. I have not been able to find any more evidence of them talking.
*I had to catch her in the act 4 different times. Each time she would lie to me and say it was over just for me to find that it was still going on. (she even lied about them making out until the very end)
*She did this while we were doing In Uterine Insemination (IUI). (we were really trying to have a baby and spending a lot of money to do so)
*She made out with the guy on several different occasions. (claims they never had sex)
*While this was all going on she continued to have sex with me and would even go on dates with me to assure me this was all over. (she was very convincing) Part of the reason I believed her each time.
I just feel like she is a liar. I don't know if I will ever be able to trust her again. I feel hurt that she would do this to me. She can't even explain why and she says she is very ashamed of herself.
She really wants me to stay but I just don't know what to do. If we didn't have a 4 year old child I don't think I would stay. But I cant bare the idea of not raising my child and only seeing her every other weekend.
Need Advice
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