I'm not sure if I'm posting this in the right section so bear with me, I'm new to this forum.
I've been engaged for around two weeks now. I have been with my man for a little over two years now and I am so in love. Soon after he proposed he told me how much he would like to start working on getting pregnant. I was a bit nervous at first but agreed to stop taking my birth control pills and make it happen. I soon became so excited about us starting our lives together and building a family.
Fast forward to last night, I accidentally overdrew on our mutual account. Here's some quick background. He makes a lot more than I do as far as income goes. We're saving for our future but of course he can save a lot more than I can... I will admit I'm not that financially savvy. I'm quick to spend and I look at the accounts later. He of course doesn't like that. We've had talks about it in the past and I'm working hard on changing my behavior but I'm not putting us in a hole. Anyways, I quickly put money back in there but he was of course pissed that it was overdrawn.
Last night during a heated argument he tells me he wants to hold off on children because he doesn't think I'm financially mature and he can see this "getting a lot worse with a child." He basically says he think I believe he's and ATM and I'm only so irresponsible because I know I have him to fall back on. I don't do it maliciously. I may ask him for a couple of dollars here or there to help me out but he tells me that my income should support me without needing him unless "it's an emergency." He was livid! Pissed off! Basically saying I'm always looking for a hand out and if something happened to him I wouldn't be able to support a child because I can't even take care of myself. My feelings were crushed.
Although I do understand where he's coming from, I'm upset because he pretty much dangled the idea of children in front of me, had me so excited about it then snatched it away at the hint of an issue. An issue that we've had for awhile. I'm hurt and floored by this man and his actions last night. He reiterated that he wants to marry me but wants to wait on children. He's my best friend and the love of my life so it stung like hell hearing the things he had to say. Am I overreacting? Do I have some valid points here?
We haven't talked much since last night. A couple of quick text messages... I can't bring myself to speak to him I'm so damn upset. I would love your views and advice!!! PLEASE help me :confused:
I've been engaged for around two weeks now. I have been with my man for a little over two years now and I am so in love. Soon after he proposed he told me how much he would like to start working on getting pregnant. I was a bit nervous at first but agreed to stop taking my birth control pills and make it happen. I soon became so excited about us starting our lives together and building a family.
Fast forward to last night, I accidentally overdrew on our mutual account. Here's some quick background. He makes a lot more than I do as far as income goes. We're saving for our future but of course he can save a lot more than I can... I will admit I'm not that financially savvy. I'm quick to spend and I look at the accounts later. He of course doesn't like that. We've had talks about it in the past and I'm working hard on changing my behavior but I'm not putting us in a hole. Anyways, I quickly put money back in there but he was of course pissed that it was overdrawn.
Last night during a heated argument he tells me he wants to hold off on children because he doesn't think I'm financially mature and he can see this "getting a lot worse with a child." He basically says he think I believe he's and ATM and I'm only so irresponsible because I know I have him to fall back on. I don't do it maliciously. I may ask him for a couple of dollars here or there to help me out but he tells me that my income should support me without needing him unless "it's an emergency." He was livid! Pissed off! Basically saying I'm always looking for a hand out and if something happened to him I wouldn't be able to support a child because I can't even take care of myself. My feelings were crushed.
Although I do understand where he's coming from, I'm upset because he pretty much dangled the idea of children in front of me, had me so excited about it then snatched it away at the hint of an issue. An issue that we've had for awhile. I'm hurt and floored by this man and his actions last night. He reiterated that he wants to marry me but wants to wait on children. He's my best friend and the love of my life so it stung like hell hearing the things he had to say. Am I overreacting? Do I have some valid points here?
We haven't talked much since last night. A couple of quick text messages... I can't bring myself to speak to him I'm so damn upset. I would love your views and advice!!! PLEASE help me :confused:
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