My previous post about this can be found here:
http://ift.tt/1rWH8SA
Background, he knows I want to have a family some day. In theory, so would he. We dated for three years. Out of which the last year was long distance. He was divorced four years ago. I've known him for 8 years (when we first became friends he hadn't met the girl he later married).
He had initiated marriage talks and backed out recently. He's not sure he ever wants to get married. He initiated the marriage talk because he was afraid of losing me - Since he knows I wouldn't be able to move on and care about someone while having daily contact with him. He can't imagine life without me. So, he thought to attempt to work with the idea of marriage because he knows it's important to me. Despite talking to me about marriage, he couldn't bring himself to feel like getting married.
Though he doesn't feel like getting married, he maintains lifestyle changes he made because of knowing the happiness it gives me. This includes cutting back on drinking (it had gotten out of hand post his divorce) and working out.
Even after clarifying he doesn't want to get married, he verbalizes that my being in his life makes his life better. And, it's because of me that he hasn't had a drink in a month and takes better care of himself and exercises.
It feels like we have everything but it's fear or lack of motivation to take things to marriage.
Any suggestions on what eases a man when he feels that way?
Or any comments or suggestions in general?
We enjoy our time together. I just don't really know, what next? Where to from here?
http://ift.tt/1rWH8SA
Background, he knows I want to have a family some day. In theory, so would he. We dated for three years. Out of which the last year was long distance. He was divorced four years ago. I've known him for 8 years (when we first became friends he hadn't met the girl he later married).
He had initiated marriage talks and backed out recently. He's not sure he ever wants to get married. He initiated the marriage talk because he was afraid of losing me - Since he knows I wouldn't be able to move on and care about someone while having daily contact with him. He can't imagine life without me. So, he thought to attempt to work with the idea of marriage because he knows it's important to me. Despite talking to me about marriage, he couldn't bring himself to feel like getting married.
Though he doesn't feel like getting married, he maintains lifestyle changes he made because of knowing the happiness it gives me. This includes cutting back on drinking (it had gotten out of hand post his divorce) and working out.
Even after clarifying he doesn't want to get married, he verbalizes that my being in his life makes his life better. And, it's because of me that he hasn't had a drink in a month and takes better care of himself and exercises.
It feels like we have everything but it's fear or lack of motivation to take things to marriage.
Any suggestions on what eases a man when he feels that way?
Or any comments or suggestions in general?
We enjoy our time together. I just don't really know, what next? Where to from here?
Put the internet to work for you.
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