I've only know him for about 3 months, but the feelings I feel towards him are... beyond words. When I see his face, it's like my world lights up and everything gets brighter. I've had many crushes before, and fancied loads of guys. But it has never come anywhere close to how I feel about him. God knows what will happen if our skin ever brushes.
The age gap is also minute. About 7/8 years? Definitely under 10. I've just turned 16, so if he wasn't my teacher, it would be ok. But it isn't. I'm not allowed to feel this way just because of the job he has.
Physically, he's perfect. My dream guy, my exact height. I can't handle it. The way he turns me on, just by looking at me is ridiculous. I get aches and shudders just thinking about him. I start to sweat. I think about him 24/7, I even dream about what I want him to do to me.
On the flipside, he is my perfect match personality wise.
His sense of humour, the way as soon as someone even looks upset, concern saturates those gorgeous eyes, he did the same degree I wanted to do. We've even had conversations about politics, ethics and the morals of life. He supports the same football team as me and we had a deep conversation about how we both felt when we lost our grandparents, at about the same time.
I just want to be with him all the time. I wish I was more attractive so he'd look at me the way I look at him. I want to kiss him, to touch him. I want him to hold me and run his hands through my hair.
But this couldn't happen. This is his first year teaching and it would ruin his career. And I would do anything, even go through all this pain, if it means he could be happy. I just don't know what to do. I know when I'm sure he'll never see me again, I'll tell him how I feel. But for now, how do I survive when I feel lonely at the weekends because I can't see him or smell his wonderful scent? Help me.
Put the internet to work for you.
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