These feelings came out of nowhere for me.
As a 45 yr old female singleton-for-life, i felt i was pretty much bulletproof by now.
But then i had my first bike wreck and lost my precious bike, damaged beyond all hope.
Enter the individual in question.
I simply needed someone to hook me up with a suitable replacement bike and thus hopefully heal the hole in my heart left by the horrible right hook that took out my precious. (Hey i really loved that bike ok!!)
I meet up with this bike mechanic this past June who i was assigned to and we get to talking about bikey things.
I have literally hung out with the dude seven times.
Yet i am a total goner!
I have spent a few hours with him talking about my bikey dreams and hopes which he has gone above and beyond to fulfill. He is super patient and kind, never condescending about my ignorance.
We also talk about life stuff of course.
He finally mentioned his wife and kids last week, which was good to have out there. He has been flirtatious, and while i figured he had to be married it was a bittersweet relief for him to confirm it.
That way now i can at least have more concrete boundaries so i know how to conduct myself appropriately!
So my usual way to deal with these feelings is to never have contact with the guy who is eliciting such pointless feelings. But he is perfect for me as my mechanic so i cannot bring myself to do so in this case. I need him still, for the sake of my bikes.
I just gotta ask y'all, do you think maybe my feelings developed for him as a sort of hero complex?
He has been a savior of my bikey goodness. ..i feel so indebted to him.
And he is nice to look at, of course. And funny, a Yoda of all things bike, etc. When we plan out my bike future we are like Wonder Twin Powers, Activate! I really dig our creative partnership.
I mainly want to find the logic, rationale, reason, impetus whatever which is the cause of these pointless feelings.
It sucks missing someone you can never have, even as just friends.
It is a pretty stupid lame situation and i mortify myself every time i imagine his wife finding out i am crushing on her man.
I mean how effing pathetic am I, in the end, right?
Ugh.
Anyway thx for reading...any insights are appreciated!!
As a 45 yr old female singleton-for-life, i felt i was pretty much bulletproof by now.
But then i had my first bike wreck and lost my precious bike, damaged beyond all hope.
Enter the individual in question.
I simply needed someone to hook me up with a suitable replacement bike and thus hopefully heal the hole in my heart left by the horrible right hook that took out my precious. (Hey i really loved that bike ok!!)
I meet up with this bike mechanic this past June who i was assigned to and we get to talking about bikey things.
I have literally hung out with the dude seven times.
Yet i am a total goner!
I have spent a few hours with him talking about my bikey dreams and hopes which he has gone above and beyond to fulfill. He is super patient and kind, never condescending about my ignorance.
We also talk about life stuff of course.
He finally mentioned his wife and kids last week, which was good to have out there. He has been flirtatious, and while i figured he had to be married it was a bittersweet relief for him to confirm it.
That way now i can at least have more concrete boundaries so i know how to conduct myself appropriately!
So my usual way to deal with these feelings is to never have contact with the guy who is eliciting such pointless feelings. But he is perfect for me as my mechanic so i cannot bring myself to do so in this case. I need him still, for the sake of my bikes.
I just gotta ask y'all, do you think maybe my feelings developed for him as a sort of hero complex?
He has been a savior of my bikey goodness. ..i feel so indebted to him.
And he is nice to look at, of course. And funny, a Yoda of all things bike, etc. When we plan out my bike future we are like Wonder Twin Powers, Activate! I really dig our creative partnership.
I mainly want to find the logic, rationale, reason, impetus whatever which is the cause of these pointless feelings.
It sucks missing someone you can never have, even as just friends.
It is a pretty stupid lame situation and i mortify myself every time i imagine his wife finding out i am crushing on her man.
I mean how effing pathetic am I, in the end, right?
Ugh.
Anyway thx for reading...any insights are appreciated!!
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