I need some advice

I have been married for 25 years. We are both in our later 40's. We have three teenage children. Last summer I found out husband was involved in an affair with a coworker(25 years younger) and someone I have known for 5 years. The chaos began after the AP's boyfriend brought it to my attention that WH brought her on a weeklong ("business trip") to NYC. Of course I was told that it wasn't true and that both her BF and I were insane. The next several months were filled with more suspicious interactions always met by vehement denials to the point that he would get in my face and scream at me that I was the crazy one. I should add that he has a long history of being out late into the night with the explanation that he was at his office working. Finally, one night, around 11:30 pm I texted him and asked where he was. He said he couldn't talk because he was driving through a snowstorm. Around 30 seconds later he accidentally texted me an audio message of the A P bad mouthing me... they were at a restaurant having drinks! Needless to say, that was enough proof and he was out of the house within a week. We went through some marriage counseling and back in June (4 months later), we decided to work towards a reconciliation. It was going in a positive direction, for a few weeks, then the AP 's (now ex) boyfriend sent me some information proving they were still interacting. That brought all chances of a reconciliation to a screeching halt. He is currently telling me that corresponding with her at that time was only through the phone and that he still wants to try and reconcile. I was mentally all in to move forward with the reconciliation back in June but since he lied to me then about being in contact with her, I think all trust has been demolished. My main concern at this point is my kids. I wonder if they are better off under one roof with both parents until they all turn 18? Do I have an ethical responsibility to make that happen f or them? After a year of lies and gas lighting I'm not sure I am able to move forward with my relationship with WH. This past year has been devastating. Any opinions on what the next step should be? Divorce? Legal separation to see if he does stop seeing OW? Another chance at reconciliation?

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