I've been dating him for 1.5 years. Last year a few weeks after he said we were bf/gf I found he'd sent a girl a picture of himself in the shower (they used to sext but that day she wasn't feeling it going off her response). I went through all his social media and found lots of sexting and cheating messages from over the years when he was with exes (he cheated on all of his girlfriends, they were "crazy, didn't love him, used him etc";). He was also sending innuendo tweets to a woman he'd slept with off Twitter when we were on a date once. Anyhow. A LOT had happened.
I don't trust him then the other week I checked his Facebook and caught him sexting an ex, she has 3 kids (lives miles away) and isn't much to look at. She asked why he'd changed all his pictures from us to just him and was messaging her but soon forgot he had a gf. He was bragging about stuff that were the opposite to his real life (going the gym everyday etc. when he doesn't) which made it seem like escapism from his insecurities. She knew he had a gf and way into the sexting she said "I thought you had someone to pleasure you" and he asked her the same and said I'm going to pleasure myself in a minute so I butted in before he could send a d*ck pic.
He's had to delete numbers off women who he said he can't trust himself with and he sometimes has to visit one workplace as they work for the same company. He flirts with lots of women but says he's just being friendly because he's in a customer facing role. Young women come up to him like "hiii, how are you, Paul?" and some have touched him messing around. No other guy in his workplace has this with the female customers.
For a year since the first incident he's blamed me for being paranoid and insecure when I should just trust him but I knew he would stray again. He won't open up to me and we've had horrible arguments where I'm in tears begging him to open up or hug me and he just sits there ignoring me or goes to bed.
I don't know what to do. I feel so trapped and don't think he will ever change. A colleague said it's like when Cheryl cheated on Ashley haha, but I feel like my own self esteem is so low I couldn't do any better. I just need some words of advice from here, please be gentle :/
He has his phone locked and no message previews. The other week the number of the one off Twitter he slept with reappeared in his phone and he blamed it on when he had to recover his phone. He showed me a picture of some old woman who appeared on his whatsapp literally 10 mins before he started sexting this ex which makes me think he added some random number to try and make me trust him when he intended to cheat that day??
Put the internet to work for you.
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