I am 41 and my husband is 44. We have known each other 20+ years but only married 15. We have 3 children (13,11, and 9)
it's been a horrible few weeks for me, i have been to hell and back in the last few weeks. My husband recently told me he is not happy and wants to leave. No mention of a current affair what so ever, but did inform me that he has cheated on me in the past. These women include strippers and people he meets at bars. My husband and i do well financially so women are attracted to this. Because i never saw this coming, I basically fall apart and did all the wrong things. I cried, begged and asked that we go to MC. He agreed, but weeks later he tells me he only agreed because he felt sorry for me.
Fast forward a week after my initial discovery i find text messages to a women. I input the phone number into Facebook and i find that this is a 20 year old ex stripper he is seeing! After a lot of research i find that he has set her up with an apartment and an allowance! How could this have happened? Who is this guy I've been married to for so long? He and i have been together thru a lot and i hardly recognize him. he is not the same person he was a month ago. I again ask to go to try and work it out, suggest that he is going thru a Midlife Crisis but he is not open to any R.
I know where this girl lives and am tempted to go speak to her. I don't know if i should mention it to her family. she is not married so i would be telling her parents and siblings. I have spoke to my in laws and they are shocked, my FIL has spoken to my husband but he is not willing to even consider R.
I don't understand how this smart guy can be so stupid. How can he trade his family and their emotional well being for a fantasy? Can he not see that this is all a fantasy? her affection is bough, why can't he see that?
I am devastated, i cant eat or drink and have done nothing at work for weeks.... I wish i could hate him... but all i can think about is my life without him. how will i tell my children? I am terrified on how this will affect them.
it's been a horrible few weeks for me, i have been to hell and back in the last few weeks. My husband recently told me he is not happy and wants to leave. No mention of a current affair what so ever, but did inform me that he has cheated on me in the past. These women include strippers and people he meets at bars. My husband and i do well financially so women are attracted to this. Because i never saw this coming, I basically fall apart and did all the wrong things. I cried, begged and asked that we go to MC. He agreed, but weeks later he tells me he only agreed because he felt sorry for me.
Fast forward a week after my initial discovery i find text messages to a women. I input the phone number into Facebook and i find that this is a 20 year old ex stripper he is seeing! After a lot of research i find that he has set her up with an apartment and an allowance! How could this have happened? Who is this guy I've been married to for so long? He and i have been together thru a lot and i hardly recognize him. he is not the same person he was a month ago. I again ask to go to try and work it out, suggest that he is going thru a Midlife Crisis but he is not open to any R.
I know where this girl lives and am tempted to go speak to her. I don't know if i should mention it to her family. she is not married so i would be telling her parents and siblings. I have spoke to my in laws and they are shocked, my FIL has spoken to my husband but he is not willing to even consider R.
I don't understand how this smart guy can be so stupid. How can he trade his family and their emotional well being for a fantasy? Can he not see that this is all a fantasy? her affection is bough, why can't he see that?
I am devastated, i cant eat or drink and have done nothing at work for weeks.... I wish i could hate him... but all i can think about is my life without him. how will i tell my children? I am terrified on how this will affect them.
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