We have attended our first night of marriage counseling and in addition to all the other homework, my wife and I are supposed to have a date night. The counselor suggested that we go out and spend the evening together, just the two of us. This includes an overnight in a motel. She wants us to try to reconnect and remember why we fell in love in the first place.
We go out as a family weekly, but we haven't had but maybe four date nights in twenty years. We have no support close, and kids don't seem to babysit anymore, so all through the child rearing years we were never able. Now that the kids are old enough to stay home, and we could do something just the two of us, C2 hasn't shown much interest in ditching the kids for a few hours. The nearest thing I have been able to get is for the last few years for us to have dinner on our anniversary, just the two of us, but that was just out for dinner, then right back home.
So the problem that I have is, I don't know what to do. We'll have dinner, because I know C2 will enjoy that, but other than that, I'm stuck. Movies are out because she said there is nothing she wants to see. Anything with physical activity (including walking) is out because she says she can't do it. We we're not into the social scene or sports, so nightclubs and sporting events are out. I suggested a comedy club, but she doesn't want to do that because she is offended by the language. The local symphony would be fun, and I think she would have a good time, but they are't in session this weekend.
She isn't giving me any help in planning the evening and everything I suggest she shoots down. What she wants to do is stay home and play her computer game. But that's what she does every night, so I would like to try to break out of that routine if possible… not to mention the counselor said to leave all the computers and the like at home.
A million years ago, when we were younger, we used to do dinner and sometimes a movie, but then we would just spend time together, often doing nothing. What do (older) couples do now for dates?
We go out as a family weekly, but we haven't had but maybe four date nights in twenty years. We have no support close, and kids don't seem to babysit anymore, so all through the child rearing years we were never able. Now that the kids are old enough to stay home, and we could do something just the two of us, C2 hasn't shown much interest in ditching the kids for a few hours. The nearest thing I have been able to get is for the last few years for us to have dinner on our anniversary, just the two of us, but that was just out for dinner, then right back home.
So the problem that I have is, I don't know what to do. We'll have dinner, because I know C2 will enjoy that, but other than that, I'm stuck. Movies are out because she said there is nothing she wants to see. Anything with physical activity (including walking) is out because she says she can't do it. We we're not into the social scene or sports, so nightclubs and sporting events are out. I suggested a comedy club, but she doesn't want to do that because she is offended by the language. The local symphony would be fun, and I think she would have a good time, but they are't in session this weekend.
She isn't giving me any help in planning the evening and everything I suggest she shoots down. What she wants to do is stay home and play her computer game. But that's what she does every night, so I would like to try to break out of that routine if possible… not to mention the counselor said to leave all the computers and the like at home.
A million years ago, when we were younger, we used to do dinner and sometimes a movie, but then we would just spend time together, often doing nothing. What do (older) couples do now for dates?
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