My wife has recently been told by a friend that after she discovered her husband was having an affair and she confronted him over it. Her husband told her he wasn't going to stop his affair and that she should be grateful to be with him since according to him she is expletive ugly and no man would have her. He also told her she ought to just look after the kids and get over it while he visits his girlfriend.
Now before this be considered more appropriate for the Coping With Infidelity topic forum, this is a historical situation. Since it occurred around 40 years ago.
This couple are still married and have been so for over 50 years yet despite being outwardly happy together, much of this and what occurred after has not been addressed or resolved to the point that the hurt remains.
That doesn't mean there weren't consequences. In response my wife's friend decided to pay get revenge and prove him wrong that other men would want her, so she then had a number of sexual relationships with 8 other men (which she enjoyed with no regrets). While letting her husband know who she was seeing and going away for days at a time while he was left to look after the kids as he had done to her. Technically since her husband was informed she wasn't cheating, what she really hoped he would do was to want her and to demand a stop to it, yet he never cared what she did.
Yet they both remained together while raising successful children, living disconnected lives while remaining together without resolving the past. He refuses (as he has always done) to talk about it with her in anyway. While she more recently undertook individual counselling because what he did and said still hurt her to her core.
Today she's now on her way out through cancer, very recently she wrote a letter to tell her kids what happened yet has since destroyed it since after her cancer has come back vociferously (with months to live) she has accepted her husband will never resolve their past and that she doesn't want to upset her kids or have them think poorly of him.
I honestly have no problem with her doing what she did, whereas I am less sympathetic towards him. Then again I once threw a bucketful of cold water on my wife while she was showering in response to her throwing a cupful of cold water on me. I think my wife's friend is the type to use a bucket rather than a cup.
I'm just wondering what some of you think about this?
Now before this be considered more appropriate for the Coping With Infidelity topic forum, this is a historical situation. Since it occurred around 40 years ago.
This couple are still married and have been so for over 50 years yet despite being outwardly happy together, much of this and what occurred after has not been addressed or resolved to the point that the hurt remains.
That doesn't mean there weren't consequences. In response my wife's friend decided to pay get revenge and prove him wrong that other men would want her, so she then had a number of sexual relationships with 8 other men (which she enjoyed with no regrets). While letting her husband know who she was seeing and going away for days at a time while he was left to look after the kids as he had done to her. Technically since her husband was informed she wasn't cheating, what she really hoped he would do was to want her and to demand a stop to it, yet he never cared what she did.
Yet they both remained together while raising successful children, living disconnected lives while remaining together without resolving the past. He refuses (as he has always done) to talk about it with her in anyway. While she more recently undertook individual counselling because what he did and said still hurt her to her core.
Today she's now on her way out through cancer, very recently she wrote a letter to tell her kids what happened yet has since destroyed it since after her cancer has come back vociferously (with months to live) she has accepted her husband will never resolve their past and that she doesn't want to upset her kids or have them think poorly of him.
I honestly have no problem with her doing what she did, whereas I am less sympathetic towards him. Then again I once threw a bucketful of cold water on my wife while she was showering in response to her throwing a cupful of cold water on me. I think my wife's friend is the type to use a bucket rather than a cup.
I'm just wondering what some of you think about this?
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