I don't know if brought this up in the past and even if I did it would be an old thread by now..
Here is my open question I am really trying to understand and get over and around.
Is it okay for a Man or a Woman to have friends of the opposite sex that have other interest beyond being friends ?
Here is my personal issue with it.. I have female friends, but I have never asked any of them out and they never gave me a personal interest.. I think the minute I ask one of them out or they give me the idea they want to be more than friends, the whole dynamic changes..
Now add in that my G.F. knows this, I think its a big no-no.. It just immediately puts your Significant Other in a position of insecurity and jealousy and justifiably so.
Why would I want that ?
What benefit does it afford me to my relationship ?
Can anyone here ever say they have a friend that is the opposite sex that NEVER said anything that if your bf or husband read would not be happy ? I'm pretty sure not..
I've worked in police cars with woman and my partner was a female for 4 years.. It was strictly work and straight talk.. We might have talked about BF or GF but nothing sexual.. Many thought we were fooling around in the beginning but eventually realized it wasn't that at all. Guys would ask me if they could ask her out.. I was like go ahead, why you asking me. They would respond I thought maybe you guys had something going on that might be private.. Only after the first guy asked her out did many realize it was what it was..
So even then it was an issue if you can see what I'm saying..
Again personally I look at any man that is a guy friend with a crooked eye.. It just doesn't sit right with me.. I'm sorry..
So if someone has some real insight, some nugget that might put me in the state of "Wow, I didn't think of it that way.. Thanks" Please I would like to hear it... I am trying real hard to open myself up to this and how to deal with this stuff.. Assuming its real friendship..
As an added note..
There is no way in the fvcking world I would accept an Ex as being a friend to a woman I was serious with.. Meaning Ex BF not husband..
Regardless of anything I think people need to put a healthy distance between Ex whatever and a new relationship.. Your Ex whatever didn't have to share you with anyone ( excluding kids ).. Why should the new person in your life share you with someone..
Here is my open question I am really trying to understand and get over and around.
Is it okay for a Man or a Woman to have friends of the opposite sex that have other interest beyond being friends ?
Here is my personal issue with it.. I have female friends, but I have never asked any of them out and they never gave me a personal interest.. I think the minute I ask one of them out or they give me the idea they want to be more than friends, the whole dynamic changes..
Now add in that my G.F. knows this, I think its a big no-no.. It just immediately puts your Significant Other in a position of insecurity and jealousy and justifiably so.
Why would I want that ?
What benefit does it afford me to my relationship ?
Can anyone here ever say they have a friend that is the opposite sex that NEVER said anything that if your bf or husband read would not be happy ? I'm pretty sure not..
I've worked in police cars with woman and my partner was a female for 4 years.. It was strictly work and straight talk.. We might have talked about BF or GF but nothing sexual.. Many thought we were fooling around in the beginning but eventually realized it wasn't that at all. Guys would ask me if they could ask her out.. I was like go ahead, why you asking me. They would respond I thought maybe you guys had something going on that might be private.. Only after the first guy asked her out did many realize it was what it was..
So even then it was an issue if you can see what I'm saying..
Again personally I look at any man that is a guy friend with a crooked eye.. It just doesn't sit right with me.. I'm sorry..
So if someone has some real insight, some nugget that might put me in the state of "Wow, I didn't think of it that way.. Thanks" Please I would like to hear it... I am trying real hard to open myself up to this and how to deal with this stuff.. Assuming its real friendship..
As an added note..
There is no way in the fvcking world I would accept an Ex as being a friend to a woman I was serious with.. Meaning Ex BF not husband..
Regardless of anything I think people need to put a healthy distance between Ex whatever and a new relationship.. Your Ex whatever didn't have to share you with anyone ( excluding kids ).. Why should the new person in your life share you with someone..
Put the internet to work for you.
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