Hey everyone-I am giving an update on a post I put in about a month ago. The situation has escalated. The long and short of it . same old same suspected the husband was having an affair by a lot of text unexplained atm withdrawals and lying about whereabouts and time off work yada yada yada. Did the confront he denied. I did the plan b no contact started individual counseling. No attempts to reconcile. He lives out of town for work so already technically separated. I think the affair has been going on for about 6-8 months but I am just become aware.
Even after the confrontation he still continued to contact her. I did not contact him. on a trip home this weekend through down the gauntlet and with the her or me and if its her then this is what needs to happen no divorce papers but drafted propsals... he refused to admit. the counselor said that before I can do that I have to be sure its is indeed an affair and to contact the other party to see what they say. I did they were shocked did not deny on the call just stammered ad hung up on me. then I texted apologizing if they felt ambushed but just wanted to know and that I don't have anything against her. No response but texting still occurred between her and my husband...
So my husband was shocked by my call and text to her because I am not the type to confront. I told him we are not married as long as this contact is going on. he ultimately ended with her last night and was pretty definitive as I approved the text before he sent it then he agreed to change his number
It didn't end there, the next morning she had been texting him and he had not responded. so she began threatening him, she ultimately showed up at my house 8am this morning!! and he actually let her in. Meanwhile I have called the police and the women is yelling for me to down and meet her!!! in my home!! She is making all kinds of threats saying where she is from who she knows etc... I refused to engage her and remained on the 3rd level of my home while she is at the front door on 1st level. It was surreal...im on the phone with dispatch telling them and they were like he let her in??? Granted she probably threatened to break the glass inlet of the door or something but I would have rather that so she could have been arrested...
So police say there is nothing I can do until she actually does a crime...meanwhile the husband is going back to work out of state and this person lives in town where I am!!! I was besides myself with anger, hurt and shame. its as if the woman wanted to see me so she could determine if he was proper in choosing me, wife of nearly 12 years over her fling for a 6mos or so. (probably my projection of the situation ) I did give her the satisfaction of my presence.
Anyway only the police he and she know about this as I am mortified. My community is probably thinking yeah another domestic situation... never called the police in my life... I feel trapped...
Even after the confrontation he still continued to contact her. I did not contact him. on a trip home this weekend through down the gauntlet and with the her or me and if its her then this is what needs to happen no divorce papers but drafted propsals... he refused to admit. the counselor said that before I can do that I have to be sure its is indeed an affair and to contact the other party to see what they say. I did they were shocked did not deny on the call just stammered ad hung up on me. then I texted apologizing if they felt ambushed but just wanted to know and that I don't have anything against her. No response but texting still occurred between her and my husband...
So my husband was shocked by my call and text to her because I am not the type to confront. I told him we are not married as long as this contact is going on. he ultimately ended with her last night and was pretty definitive as I approved the text before he sent it then he agreed to change his number
It didn't end there, the next morning she had been texting him and he had not responded. so she began threatening him, she ultimately showed up at my house 8am this morning!! and he actually let her in. Meanwhile I have called the police and the women is yelling for me to down and meet her!!! in my home!! She is making all kinds of threats saying where she is from who she knows etc... I refused to engage her and remained on the 3rd level of my home while she is at the front door on 1st level. It was surreal...im on the phone with dispatch telling them and they were like he let her in??? Granted she probably threatened to break the glass inlet of the door or something but I would have rather that so she could have been arrested...
So police say there is nothing I can do until she actually does a crime...meanwhile the husband is going back to work out of state and this person lives in town where I am!!! I was besides myself with anger, hurt and shame. its as if the woman wanted to see me so she could determine if he was proper in choosing me, wife of nearly 12 years over her fling for a 6mos or so. (probably my projection of the situation ) I did give her the satisfaction of my presence.
Anyway only the police he and she know about this as I am mortified. My community is probably thinking yeah another domestic situation... never called the police in my life... I feel trapped...
Put the internet to work for you.
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